Bryanboy Loves… and Random Cheesemax
#1 – I LOVE PARIS HILTON’S NEW VIDEO ("Stars Are Blind")!!! Oh my god all my anal hemorrhoids are flaring up just by watching it. Loves it. That’s hot! Ugh.
#2 – Bryanboy loves people from Malmo, Sweden, Athens, Greece, Irvine, CA, Busby, Alberta Canada, Rome, Italy, Bremerton, WA, Vevey, Switzerland, Worcester, MA, Jakarta, Indonesia, Bridgetown, St. Michael Barbados, Goleta, CA, Del Viso, Buenos Aires, Argentina, Lerster, Sweden and all the people in the small town of Mietinkyl, Southern Finland. Gimme a shout y’all. Say hi, don’t be shy!
Bryanboy At His Rawest
People seem to have this impression that everything about me is fabulous. I don’t blame them because that’s the image I project: my life is fabulous, I love beautiful things, I drool over beautiful people, I go to nice places etc. Flaunt it cause you have it. Show it while you have it. Work it like you own it. Fake it till you make it. I dress like a princess but in reality I’m just a pauper.
In the past few months I’ve received no less than a dozen emails from people (shit, I dropped my cigarette on my crotch as I typed that sentence) with questions like "what does Bryanboy wear when he’s at home?" etc. I also get compliments from many, many people complimenting me about my skin, which I don’t really understand cause I have terrible, terrible awful skin. Hah!
It’s Monday afternoon and I just got up less than an hour ago. I’m dead bored so I figured, why not surprise you lot with what the OTHER SIDE of BRYAN looks like.
Take note of all that excess flesh… now you know why I’m promoting my watermelon diet… oh and all that stubble on my face. You probably don’t see it now but you will, later.
Anyway, all I wear at home is a plain ol tee and boxers. It’s all about comfort clothes here. No juicy couture sweats whatsoever. Sometimes I’d even roam around the house wearing nothing but some y-front briefs on.
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Now, If the image above isn’t shocking enough, the photo you are about to see will HAUNT you for the rest of your life and change the way you think of me — Le Superstar Fabuleux my fuckin asshole.
Excessively Preppy. Office Worker Chic
Boy oh boy, what an unbelievable weekend I had. It rained cats and dogs on Saturday night and it was pouring parties left and right. The awful H2O that fell from the sky didn’t stop my preppy-wannabe ass from hopping from one party to another.
I left the house at 7PM and it wasn’t even raining. As soon as I crossed the territorial borders of the big city with the bright lights, it started to pour. A friend called and even suggested that I should unleash the fur and the Jacket-a-wheelers cause it was pissing down with rain. Thank god I brought a Dior Homme dinner jacket with me.
Super super drunk but I still look fierce. And fugly. Look at the face. Hahaha!
Too bad she called in late. I friggin wore a white top and beige trousers. Eeek! My dry cleaners will have a ball as soon as I send in my shit. LOL.
Hat by Chanel, top from Neil Barrett, fish necklace from Chanel, pearl belt (worn as necklace) by Chanel, faux pearls necklace from a flea market, B bag from Fendi, bracelet by Hermès, trousers by Prada, shoes from Louis Vuitton.
Celebrity Schmelebrity. Fuck me. I’m Famous.
I wish. Hah!
Ohhhhhhhh Where the fucking hell are my haters when I fucking need them most? I’m currently on a roll because my sheer existence on this planet has been validated once, I mean, twice, again.
Let’s face it, everyone seeks fucking validation and acceptance. Some people aim to be accepted by a certain crowd, some people seek validation from their friends, some people want to be accepted by their families & love ones and some people… are struggling to accept themselves. I, on the other hand, being the geek that I am, seek acceptance AND validation from all the glorious and fabulous people in the world of the interweb.
First off… my favourite, favourite, FAVOURITE paparazzi photo website ofyoung Hollywood celebs, Celebworld.org surprised me with my own entry. Allow me to indulge and enter a state of delusional bliss for thinking I’m on the same ranks with my "buddies" Lindsay, Paris, Kim Kardashian (who the hell is she?), Britney and Jessica.
Visit http://www.celebworld.org to view my page or you can go to it directly:
God I’m soooo fuckin delusional eh? But whatever. It’s all about having fun.
WORK IT LIKE YOU OWN IT. FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT!
My ego brings all the boys to the yard… and they’re like, it’s better than yours. Damn right, it’s better than yours, I can teach you, but I have to charge. La la-la la la, warm it up, La la-la la la, the boys are waiting.
Next stop are the amazing people at Celebrities.com, a website that belongs to Hollywood’s King of the Paparazzi, E.L. Woody. I got a mention on their site/blog once again.
Visit http://www.celebrities.com/blog/?p=1336 to see me there.
I know, I know, I should stop this delusion of
grandeur fame but isn’t it fucking amazing how I’m such a NOBODY in the third world yet I’m all over the place on the net? Ok, not ALL OVER the place as in literally… hopefully we’ll get there, one straight man converted to faggotry at a time… HAHAHA… but still.
Man, I should get fuckin endorsement deals left and right where I live (I WANT MY OWN DAMN BILLBOARD GOD DAMMIT) but they’d rather chose mixed race mongrels, half GI-BABY/american soldier, half-reformed prostitute whatever. Maybe because they’re prettier than my ugly brown fat ass. Who knows? I really need to get a fuckin nose job and chin implant soon.
MY "OBLIGATORY PAPARAZZI SHOTS" ARE FINALLY PAYING OFF!!
HAHAHAHA! Look at me go all bitter and venomous. Ouch. God forbid the stench of all that vitriol I’ve been spitting will kill me one day.
Anyway… I’m a happy camper. The complaining stops here. Attention seeker got his dose of attention for the day and I’ll shut my trap for now.
Last, but not the least, I’m still waiting for the gorgeous folks at The San Francisco Chronicle, who interviewed me over the phone not too long ago, to publish me (podcast) on their site. They recently launched a podcast targeting Filipinos in the San Francisco/Bay Area. God knows whether or not they’ll post my interview cause I could barely remember what I said to the lovely reporter. It was 4AM! I wouldn’t be surprised if I spat profanities throughout the interview but we’ll see. All my fingers and toes are crossed and you’ll be the first one to know when that interview comes out…. if EVER they decide to publish it out. LOL.
On that profound note, I’ll keep this entry short and start working on a longer entry.
I was supposed to go out last night. I backed out and fell asleep. At 10:30PM! I didn’t have anything NOTHING to wear. I’m saving my John Galliano jacket for a special ocassion. Those Filipino bloody designers better start sending me free clothes, ok, I don’t wanna be a freeloader but a fuckin 50% discount would suffice. God my face is so thick it’s unbelievable.
Someone please snap me back to reality and burst my ego bubble.
Don’t feed the ego cause the ego’s trying to be anorexic.
You all know how to get a hold of me. Email firstname.lastname@example.org or SMS +63.915.785.1492
I love you all. Spread the faggotry alive!
PS. Discuss this blog post here.