On the last leg of my OZ trip, I went a little further up north of Sydney to visit a friend overnight. I wasn’t able to shop AT ALL in Sydney because a lot of the stores were closed on Sunday and I really didn’t have the time. I did visit the Chanel store for a few minutes… boy oh boy oh boy, that Americana collection is fantastic. But $6,000 (was it 6 or was it 8? I’m not sure) for a jacket? Rupert Murdoch lend me your mastercard please.
Bryanboy in trainers? SHOCK HORROR!
One of the shops I thoroughly enjoyed, believe it or not, was Woolworths… the Australian version of Walmart. It was a grocery store alright, smacked in the middle of nowhere New South Wales, and going there was soo surreal! If you have seen The Simple Life, think of me as Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie going to Walmart in bumfuck America. It was a visual feast seeing normal, non-fashiony, non-Margiela wearing Australians.
Click click click!
I have big news. Very BIG news.
Unfortunately, I can’t reveal it at the moment but the people involved are moving mountains to make it possible. I’m scared, nervous AND very excited at the same time. I don’t know about you but it’s HUGE for me. I think this is a fabulous and amazing test for bigger, brighter things to come this fall.
All my loyal readers SHOULD know that my plans get jinxed the moment I share them so I’m gonna shut my trap for now. You’ll find out in… oh god… 11 or 12 days. I have my fingers and my toes crossed for this one.
Oh and if there’s a generous soul out there who wants to slap my face with cold, hard cash via paypal you may do so now because I’ll be needing it. TONS OF IT!
PS. There’s another thing I want to share but I have to wait until it materializes. I’ll give you two clues though: Marc Jacobs and Conde Nast.
It just occured to me…
I just got off the phone from one of my friends in Nu Yawk. I’ve been wanting to visit
Bergdorf Goodman Barneys and my friend Tinsley Mortimer him for ages so I went to the US Embassy website to check the requirements and procedures for a tourist visa. I know these things change from time to time so it’s best to do your research. You go check it out yourself. If you don’t get overwhelmed with the amount of information on that page then you must be something else. I had to close my browser after 30 seconds, talk about information overload. My eyes oh my good lord my precious eyes. It’s pretty much the same requirements as other countries — the same usual bullcrap paperwork blah blah blah — except they want everything else, like your nonexistent first born child.
IMO, I should be the least of the embassy’s worries. Think about it — when my life sorta kinda revolves around my blog, do you HONESTLY, HONESTLY think I’m gonna go online as soon as I get out of the mail
order bride plane and say "OH HAYY GUYS I JUST LAND HERE IN ESTADOS UNIDOS ME I’M GOING TO BE AN ILLEGAL ALIEN I NO COME BACK TO FEELIPEENIS OKEY????" LOL.
On a serious note, maybe one of you can answer my question. I know you’re **NOT** allowed to work on a tourist, B-2 visa. That’s already given and it totally makes sense. Why work when you’re ON HOLIDAY????? But if you are a full-time blogger, does that mean you’re **NOT ** allowed to blog (because that’s "work") considering you’re getting paid to blog/you get income from blogging WHILE being in the USA? For instance, I may be in the Philippines right now but I’m getting income from the ad networks in the USA — what if I go to New York like tomorrow? Remember how Perez went to Australia not too long ago to host the MTV awards or whatever. Did he blog/worked whilst on a tourist visa? Probably.
Anyway, that’s what worries me right now. I don’t know about you but the thought of INS people knocking on my hotel room door at 3AM just to get me deported for blogging online about shoes I bought and how I roamed around the statue of liberty wearing nothing but a thong is some serious scary shit, don’t you think? I know American immigration authorities are on a roll, revoking visas of European/British entertainers like Lily Allen and the likes so it’s best to play it safe.
What do you think? Does anyone know some sort of an immigration lawyer who can answer that question for FREE? Free because I’m pretty, no doubt about that. Any advice is appreciated. Oh and Perez, Trent and Michael K, y’all better back me up bitches we’re gonna throw a huge gangbang in my honor as soon as I get my fat ass ova there. Just kidding.
Australian Government, anyone?
I know there’s a shitload of people around the world who read my website including people from the land of the kangaroos, uncircumcised surfer boys with funny accents and Ksubi so maybe they can answer my question. Depending on my projects and if I have time… AND money lol… I’m seriously thinking of going to Sydney on holiday for a week and Melbourne too for another week to visit one of my buddies over the next few months when it’s cold there.
Does anyone know whether or not it’s easy to get an Australian tourist visa? Do I need to compile a shitload of paperwork, wait for months to get an appointment, overdose myself on hardcore tranquilizers, queue for HOURRRRRRRRRRRRSSSSSSS, deal with bollocking bitchy Filipino pleb receptionists before getting interviewed by an ageing consul who will ask silly things like "what are you planning to do in our country" despite the fact that you’ve written "VACATION & TOURISM PURPOSES – I AM GONNA FUCKING PUMP MONEY IN YOUR GOD DAMN ECONOMY AND TRY TO CONTRACT AN STD, ASSHOLES!" on the visa application form.
I went to the Australian embassy website and there’s far too much information my mere 2 brain cells can handle. I just fucking give up. I know many of you out there don’t need a visa to go to Australia because y’all have first world passports but in my case (this is in addition to looking like a brown ricer whore), I’m one of the 84 million unfortunate third world souls in this fabulous country whose booger-coloured passport comes with a warning label that says "WARNING: POTENTIAL BOAT PERSON ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT".
Please tell me they’re easy to deal with and they’re like EU/Schengen embassies where everything is a breeze.
I find it funny that I’m asking this question here considering the buddy I’m planning to visit in Melbourne did an internship for the OZ government and got assigned here for a year but bitch doesn’t know anyone in the consular department. LOL.
Email or post a comment if you have something to say. Bryanboy@gmail.com.
P.S. On a totally unrelated subject, IS IT TRUE THAT GETTING A COMMUNITY TAX CERTIFICATE (I’m starting another business/venture blah blah blah) COSTS P5,000 IN MAKATI????
Backpacker Culture vs Bryanboy Culture
My oh my. I must have received at least 80 emails (84 emails to be exact) in the past few hours telling me **NOT** to go backpacking. Jesse from San Diego was "disgusted with the whole idea of backpacking" and I’m just putting myself "at risk".
Hmmm. The more people who tell me NOT to go backpacking the more I want to do it. I don’t know why y’all hate the thought. I mean, surely it can’t be THAT bad. I’ll let the following pictionary speak for itself. I found a shitload of backpacker pictures online and I’ll compare them to some of my old travel pictures.
For instance, meet Han of Singapore. Han is 24 years old and he’s currently finishing his law degree. He went backpacking to a lot of places all over the world. Here’s a photo of him in Turkey.
The biggest pictionary EVAR is waiting for you after the jump. If you’re on dialup, don’t click the link below because this post is overloaded with photos.
Stupid Question: Bryanboy = Backpacker?
I know this is a ridiculously stupid question because I’ve never "roughed it up" or gone "backpacking" before… but can I go "backpacking" with an LV trunk? I don’t have a real, real backpack like those hideous 5-foot high nylon-and-mesh bullcrap that a lot of young Brits and Australians seem to carry.
The Bryanboy Camel Pic: For some strange reason, many people all over the world LOVE this photo. I want to have another "kodak moment", this time, with another animal, like an elephant, tiger or orangutan. Click here to read the camel picture story.
I chatted to my Mexican buddy yesterday. I asked him the LV question and his reply was: "…………… no comment". I brought this whole backpacking subject to him a few months back and he told me I have to ditch biz/first class tickets, hotel suites and designer luggage if I’m really serious about backpacking.
Even one of my Brit friends told me it’s nice to keep things "REAL" by travelling via land (i.e. trains, buses, etc), stay at "youth" hostels, etc. The ocassional splurge is allowed, i.e. a fancy meal at a fabulous restaurant or the odd shopping here and there… but nothing outrageously excessive.
It all sounds appalling AND appealing at the same time. But when you think about it, maybe he’s right.
Pack your bags, we’re going to Brazil!
I’ve always wanted to go to Rio de Janeiro. It’s one of my dream destinations. Fuck New York, London, Paris or Milan. If you’re looking for guys galore, nothing beats Brazilian boy toys so get your lazy, fat ass to Rio!
I need a "proper" vacation and I can’t even remember the last time I had one. You know, no computers, no cellphones, no stress, no pressure, no emotional distress, no familia de horreur, no Eunice… ok.. what am I talking about, I need Eunice…
Tell me, don’t you just wanna hop on top of this guy and sit on his crotch… I mean, hop on a plane and catch up with your tan on the beaches of Ipanema?
Photo credit: Blogmadeinbrazil.com
Girls, pack your Goyards! We’re going to Switzerland!
Holy fucking shiyet. I was checking my emails earlier and guess what I found. Two of my readers, Vanessa and Caroline emailed me a photo of themselves with their own rendition of the Infamous Bryanboy pose, in Rome, of all places.
What really ticked me though is the gift Vanessa sent. A link to one of Switzerland’s tourism-related TV commercials.
Why not escape during this summer’s world cup in a country where men spend less time on football… and more time on you?
Click here to watch the TV commercial.
OH. MY. GOD. I’m at a complete loss of words. It’s about time someone used ‘sex tourism’ to encourage people to go to their country.
Imagine the huge influx of tourists and visitors that would go to the land of the brown, l’exotique and the natives if THE PHILIPPINES used a brown-assed prostitute such as myself on one of their ad campaigns.
FUCK crystal-clear waters and white sand beaches. Everyone knows that SEX SELLS… AND SO DO I !!!!!!!!!!!!
Girls, pack your Vuitton steamer trunks, your Goyard Luggage and Globe-Trotter suitcases. We’re going to Switzerland!!!!!!!!
PS. Discuss this blog post on my Online Discussion Forum.
If These Walls Could Talk!
I would like to say "thanks" to the Pied Piper of Manila, Carlos Celdran (and his fabulous & highly-recommended walking tours) for NOT BEING AVAILABLE on a bloody Thursday. Carlos!!!!!!! I hope you’re
listening to me reading this… it’s about time that you clone yourself! I was gonna send a fellow blogger over to you but you don’t have any weekday tours available. Thanks to you, I lost soo much weight from an hour’s worth of walking. I burned so many calories I think I might have reached my exercise quota for the entire year!
I went to Intramuros and Fort Santiago yesterday afternoon with Gareth and my younger sister.
I got up at 10:30AM yesterday after my little KFC extravanganza. I wanted Gareth to see one of Manila’s top tourist attractions (other than myself, of course) so I picked him up at around 2:30PM.