Bryanboy.com - Fashion Blogger
1:31 am

Hairspray, gel and Brazilians.

21/09/2007, Current Affairs

Hairspray, gel and Brazilians.

For those of you who emailed, no, I didn’t have any control with my hair whatsoever. None at all. In fact, I told the stylist before the shoot I want my hair done a certain way but they were adamant with their decision. Even if I know (after all these years of being self-obsessed and camwhoring) what looks right for me, who am I to question things? I stated my opinion, they listened to it, they want to give me a different look then so be it. I’m trying hard not to be a diva (because I’m not!! haha) if you know what I mean. At least that’s what I learned from watching American, Australian, British, Canadian even bloody Abyssinian bloody Next Top Model. So yeah, just cross your fingers and hope that THEIR pictures turn out to be alright because I know there’s a baby jesus crying somewhere as I’m writing this.

bryanboy

Click click click!

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10:12 pm

Get your freak on.

20/09/2007, Current Affairs

Get your freak on.

Cecile… look at my hair!!!

I had my outfit planned — I was going to wear this thing from my closet that I really want to wear AND my good ol’ pompadour (minus the watch and the bracelet) but the powers that be changed my outfit from head to toe… and then they gave me a slick back.

bryanboy

Isn’t it funny how I still look androgynous (AM I A FAG OR AM I A LESBIAN? YOU DECIDE.) in spite of the fact that I’m wearing a jacket, trousers, a white shirt that Uncle Karl would be proud of and a bowtie.  Ugh I look sooo old!!!!

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2:19 pm

The hair, the horse and the hound.

05/09/2007, Current Affairs

The hair, the horse and the hound.

I left my camera at home and I’m too lazy to put some effort. I want to be low-maintenance for a change: simple basic top, shorts, flip flops, ditch the maquillage other than a teeny, tiny coat of clear lip gloss. And the result? NOT A PRETTY SIGHT.

hair

Isn’t it funny how trying to look effortless is the hardest thing on earth? So effortless I should’ve worn a plain white tee instead — the fact that I forgot to do that means I didn’t put an effort at all. LOL. Click click click for more hair pics!

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5:37 pm

Protected: Busy Bee

04/09/2007, Current Affairs

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9:08 am

FUCK I’M FAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD DAMN THIS IS NASTY!!!!!

02/09/2007, Current Affairs

FUCK I’M FAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH MY GOD I’M CRYING!!!!!!!! I’m gonna have Sunday brunch with a friend and I thought it would be nice if I take my size 34 (size zero) black Chanel skinny jeans for a spin and the snap button closure keeps on popping out when I try to sit down. There is nothing more repulsive than being a "size 0" with a muffin top, no? I take pride in being able to fit into the smallest Chanel size and to think, Chanel is really generous when it comes to pret-a-porter sizing but god damn if the smallest size doesn’t fit it only means one thing: I’m FAT!

Chanel jeans

PLEASE GOOD LORD ALMIGHTY TELL ME I’M NOT BACK TO A SIZE 2 or worse, a 4. It’s funny how I have things from size 0 – 4 (I fluctuate) but man, today is a bad day, I swear. I hate it when I fluctuate and clearly I’ve gained again. I thought I lost major poundage but I gained it all back in the past few weeks because of all the cakes, donuts and fast food I’ve been eating. It’s your fault Mauricio. You and your stupid bear fetish got me all reaching out for the carbs again. I think it’s a ploy for you to make me gain and it worked!

Water fast (does red bull count?), grean leafy vegetables and adderall (just kidding. where are those damn chinese crack pills when you need them most?), here I come. I should be able to flush this poundage down the drain in a few days.

PS. I really want to wear Chanel today because Chanel is having a moment with their fantastic Mademoiselle campaign around the world. Check it out at www.mademoiselle-forever.com and tell me which is your favourite city. I think they did it best in Paris. Nobody even bat an eyelash when they ran the campaign in London.

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3:31 pm

Protected: Life is full of surprises

25/08/2007, Current Affairs

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7:33 pm

Postal ID

23/08/2007, Current Affairs

Postcards from the third world: Postal ID

Ignore that photo. Damnnnn I look like a fat jailbait retarded. That shit is soo old I can’t be bothered to take a new one. I went through hell fire and back just to get one of these cheap-ass laminated IDs that is oh so third world.

Postal ID

Click click click!

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1:05 am

Protected: Mad about McDonald’s + Natasha Poly & Snejana Onopka Showdown at Missoni

22/08/2007, Current Affairs

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12:46 am

Protected: Boy. Girl. Camp it up fag. Tomboy.

17/08/2007, Current Affairs

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1:32 am

Bryanboy’s Hobby Outfit #2

16/08/2007, Current Affairs

Bryanboy’s Hobby Outfit #2

Here’s another outfit I came up with… well, I made everything except the shirt, the pearls, the boots, the sunglasses and the handbag. To quite simply put it, I made* the shorts, the headpiece, added the little ribbon on the shirt and finally, the lightweight black thing that to this date, I still don’t know what to call it. It’s as long as a coat but it has a hood and pockets on the front like an oversized cardigan. Is it a parka? Or should I call it… the coatdigan? It’s a start eh? What do you think?

Bryanboy

More pics and videos coming up! Don’t you just LOOOOOOOVEEEE rainy days? Everyone looks pretty during rainy season except peasants like the fat bitch behind me.

Just kidding. I’m nice. PROMISE!!!! I’m an equal opportunity lover in real life! I only say mean shit online to get attention because I’m a big fat whore! Case in point: take one good look at her chubby face and then take a look at mine and no doubt we’re both alumnis of Brookhaven Obesity Clinic. The point is…. I’m 116 pounds and she’s 118. Maybe 117 if you push it. Got it?

*I didn’t make them as in I didn’t sew them myself. I went to the sewing people with my stick figure, crayola sketches and instructions.

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