Bryanboy.com - Fashion Blogger
1:18 am

I Beat ANOREXIA!

14/01/2007, Clubbing

I Beat ANOREXIA!

Y’all better buy me that "I Beat Anorexia!" t-shirt after the binge I had at McDonald’s earlier this morning.

2 double cheeseburgers, 2 large cokes, 2 large fries and 2 x 6pc chicken nuggets in a span of 2 hours. I’m gonna be soo screwed for life but what the heck, we only get to live once and when it’s over, it’s over. Why deprive ourselves? There’s always liposuction and collonic irrigation.

CONTINUE READING

[pinit]
7:51 am

Weekend Bender

13/11/2006, Clubbing, Current Affairs, Food and Drink, Friendships, Philippines

Weekend Bender

OMG. I think I’m destined to be a matron.

I finally had the chance to wear my nice, new (well it’s vintage so whatever) sweater that I got from "I Love You Store". It’s sooo cute. I really really really love it. I was looking at some of my weekend photos and thought "damn, I look like someone familiar."

CONTINUE READING

[pinit]
4:25 pm

Caption It

27/06/2006, Clubbing

Caption It

Look what I found on the internet, courtesy of www.willysaw.com. It’s me on halloween last year! Man, those were the crazeeeeey times. I think I really look good as a prostitute. Yes?

Baboosh_3

PS. Discuss this blog post on my Online Discussion Forum.

[pinit]
1:56 am

Party Season Finally Over…

26/06/2006, Clubbing

Party Season Finally Over…

… or has it only just begun?

I’m terribly, terribly exhausted. It’s 10PM and I just got up an hour or two ago feeling like a zombie. There’s no doubt that alcohol and tranquilizers are still running through my bloodstream and I urgently need to detoxify myself as soon as possible. I have a shitload of cigarette burns on my fingers and arms in addition to all the blisters on my toes from wearing 5-inch Lanvin cone heels last night at the Preview Best Dressed Ball. Why oh why am I doing this to myself all for the sake of partying?

This week has been the craziest week ever… too many parties, too many events, so little time to recuperate.

I’ll start with Friday night. I went to Mega Magazine’s 10 Most Beautiful Women event and the party, sponsored by Mercedes Benz and Moet & Chandon, was a smashing success. Champagne and cognac overflowed and so did Manila’s finest. It was my first time to go to a "Mega" event and it was held at my favourite museum in Manila, the Ayala Museum.

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Jacket by Zara, white shirt by Kenneth Cole, pearl belt used as a necklace by Chanel, necktie by Dior Homme, brooch I got at a department store for like US$15, fabulous snakeskin bag from Tesoro’s, gray jeans from Neil Barrett, shoes by Dior Homme.

A lot of people complimented me because of my "new look". Oh I don’t know. Maybe I should wear jackets and shirts often? I think I may have to say goodbye to tanks and tees when I go out at night, considering I’m not really a jacket-and-shirt person. Nevertheless, it’s about time, don’t you think?

I went to the Museum on my own as some of my friends were late and the first person who greeted me was Filipina supermodel-cum-photographer Joan. I love this girl. She’s always painfully chic every time I see her.

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Forzieri.com / Firenze Seta srl

Mega Magazine’s Editor-in-Chief Carla Sibal initiating the ceremony. This woman is something else. She’s AMAZING! I love her! Everywhere I go, everyone always whisper how beautiful and chic she is… oh and how fabulous her hair is ALL THE FUCKING TIME! She’s one fierce woman you’ll never caught dead with bad hair. I love her. She’s really really nice and she’s always got this glow on her face the few times I’ve seen her.

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Who doesn’t want fabulous, healthy, flawless skin?
GreatSkin.com

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I have absolutely no idea who this gorgeous girl is but man, she’s sooo fucking tall and I look like a midget. I think she’s like 6-foot-4 or something… and she wore like flats! She sorta reminds me of Karolina Kurkova. No?

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Who doesn’t want fabulous, healthy, flawless skin?
GreatSkin.com

Hannah and me…

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Philippine Tatler’s Fashion Editor Karla A, designer/artist Mitch Dulce, who I haven’t seen in ages and moi.

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Handbags at 10 paces galore! Do the infamous Bryanboy pose bag hags!

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Tina and Tessa, fab girls of L’Oreal and Shu Uemura, who recently sponsored my survey…

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More pictures of people….

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Après-Mega, we went to our usual haunt, Cusine at La Embajada for more boozeing and cruising. Even saw designer Ino Caluza, créateur of the best custom-made jeans (Viktor Jeans) in the Philippines. I even went to his shop yesterday, bought 2 pairs of jeans and 2 custom-made jackets. I LOVE LOVE LOVE it!

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Please touch my fat fanny… the last time someone grabbed my bum was EXACTLY 6 months ago.

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I should come with a warning label. I’m pretty much like a bomb that can explode anytime, without notice, no wonder people stay away from me so it’s best to stay away from me.

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Work it like you own it. Fake it till you make it. I have one thing to say. Sashay, shante, shante, shante!

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Apply now for an American Express card and get an instant decision in seconds.
American Express

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Why is my head chopped off on this photo?

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If you’re a fan of Filipino, third world showbiz, these faces are prolly familiar to you.

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Forzieri.com / Firenze Seta srl

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Ooh lala. I must have a photo with this guy, too. Whatever, right?

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… he’s that guy in that Big Brother show… and of course… the photo below… Oh. My. God. Mama Mia here we go again…

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Today’s Obligatory Paparazzi Shot

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Forzieri.com / Firenze Seta srl

Enough party pictures for now. More updates to follow… stay tuned for Bryanboy Loves… and Random Cheesemax.

As always, I love each and every one of you. Email bryanboy@gmail.com or SMS +63.915.785.1492.

Baboosh_3

PS. Discuss this blog post on my Online Discussion Forum.

[pinit]
8:14 am

A Memorable Night

25/06/2006, Clubbing

A Memorable Night

7:11Am and I just got home about an hour ago. I’ve been indulging on asparagus soup, ham sandwich and spring rolls.. at this time of the day! Gotta love Eunice and the cook. Hah!

Man, what a night I had.

My damn camera’s fucked up… I totally forgot to charge my batteries hence the lack of photos. Nevertheless, a shitload of people asked to take photos of me (I love each and every one of you, my dear readers) so I hope they’d email me a copy soon. *hint hint*. HELLO BITCHES! hahahaha

I’m glad I went out tonight. Seriously. I won’t get into any specifics but tonight’s been very bittersweet. I was genuinely happy I’ve patched things up with people from my not-so-long past… It’s refreshing to see how a lot of people have changed. Some people were the same, some were completely different. Nevertheless, the most important thing is that I (hopefully) clarified things with people I previously had disagreements and misunderstandings with… yaddi yaddi yadda.

The sad part is, I think I might have lost someone really close to me.  Someone I really love to bits. It’s completely my fault though. It’s not the first time that I’ve been told that I give people a bad reputation simply because they’re associating themselves with me. Isn’t it sad? However, that’s not really the core problem/case.

I’ve been told, not once, not twice, but probably a couple of times that I turn into this completely different person whenever I’m in a "group" of people. I tend to embarass the people "I’m with" (again, in a group), especially when I’m drunk, and apparently, I deliberately go on a "mission to lose the few people who have given me the chance" (i.e. the very few people who decide to hang out with me).

Let’s face it. In this shithole of the third world, nobody really wants to hang out with me. I have the worst reputation ever. Half of the people who make the effort to talk to me would rather hang out with me in private where nobody can see us and half of the people who do hang out with me are genuine, nice-hearted people but I somehow, one way or another, tend to UNCONCIOUSLY trash them.

Someone really close to me sent me a message earlier on how he/she got "a lot of flak by associating him/herself with me". In all honesty, I wasn’t surprised by a single bit. I’ve heard this sooo many times and it wasn’t anything new. I did, however, expressed my apologies though. He/she was a good friend and I admire him/her for sticking up for me. Let’s face it, it’s extremely rare for someone to put up with all the bullshit that I have in my life. It takes balls… and attitude… for someone to actually sacrifice their reputations just to be my "friend".

It’s sad really, but it’s the truth. 

For instance, I tried to talk to someone whom I had a major fight about 6 months ago. I said hi last night and guess what she told me: "FUCK YOU. GO TO YOUR FRIENDS!" and she left me hanging there whilst she walked away.

Another example was sometime last year when I went to Hong Kong to meet up a guy I chatted to for quite a little while. Ok, perhaps not a long time but still. He showed me around one night to a couple of bars, clubs and introduced me to some of his friends. I had a blast at the end of the night and genuinely thanked him for his hospitality. I’ve never had so much fun in his area before.

I thought everything was fine until fast forward a few months later, on an internet forum, here’s what he said about me.

"I may not know him but I have met him and, unfortunately for them, introduced him to a few of my friends. One he slapped, the other he insulted verbally within 5 seconds of meeting them. Damage limitation by moving him to another bar did not help as it entailed walking a block up a hill. Once in there he proceeded by nearly getting me barred from a place I’d used for two years and got on well with the manager by insisting he flicked ash in the bars ice sink."

Ouch, right? And to think, I wasn’t AWARE that’s what happened. I thought I REALLY had a blast yet.. that was his version of the story.

The funny part is, this backstabbing wench even had the balls to email me a couple of months later asking me to promote his little art/gallery website since he’s moved from HK to another country. Absolutely hilarious.

Anyhooooooo.. am I the most insensitive, carefree person in the world?

I don’t know.

I *DO* make the effort to put on my best. I am, by no means, perfect, but I try to be as decent as I possibly can. I don’t want to be one of those people who are absolutely "contrived" and watch every single move they make and/or say. It’s just NOT ME!

Anywhow, I guess it would be fair to come into the conclusion that maybe… just maybe… I’m really destined to be a loner. I’ve always been one since I was a child and I wouldn’t be surprised if it happens to me whilst I’m an adult.

Let’s face it: for the past few years, I’ve "hopped" from one "crowd" to another…. a separate groupd of "friends" here, a new "group" of friends there. A shitload of people, I’m telling you…. but… I’m not the type who’s got a "REAL" best friend from "day 1". I don’t even have childhood friends at all. It’s a sad fact, really, but in reality, I *DO NOT HAVE* a "best friend" that I could call, talk, or whatever about my day-to-day problems. I always tell people who I come across with… "shit man, you’re so lucky to have the friends that you have now. I don’t!".

I guess that’s how life is. Some people are blessed of having fantastic, flawless relationships (and friendships) with people, whereas some, like me, are cursed, without NONE.

How many of you have a "REAL" "REAL" best friend? I bet most of you have one whereas I, on the other hand, have NONE.

Whatever. The most I could do at this point is make the effort to change myself for the better. One can only change themselves to a certain extent.

Bah! I’m gonna finish my soup and go to bed. To those of you in the third world who went to the Preview Magazine party and took FUGLY pictures of me, please, I’m begging you to email pictures of myself at bryanboy@gmail.com.

Shit, I wore a Galliano jacket, Viktor jeans (oh yeah, metallic), my 5-inch Lanvin shoes, Bernard Wilhelm top yaddi yaddi yadda.

As always, you know how to get a hold of me. Email bryanboy@gmail.com or SMS +63.915.785.1492.

I love you all.

Baboosh_3

PS. Discuss this blog post on my Online Discussion Forum.

[pinit]
9:31 pm

Absolut Makes a Boy Like Me Happy!

22/06/2006, Clubbing

Happy Camper

I got home quite early this morning (4:30AM!!!) after a night of parties, parties and parties. I had to go to a couple of events last night and was originally planning to do what those Upper East socialites do during fashion week in New York — change outfits in the car before hopping from one party to the next. I ended up with only 2 outfits. I couldn't be bothered to change at the end of the night because I got drunk soo early. Hahaha!

The photo below pretty much sums up how I felt. I showed last night's photos to a friend in Australia and he told me this is the best photo of me that he's seen in a long time. I look "genuinely" happy.

Quite surprising, actually.

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… and boy do I fuckin look good. Yes? I hope you'll agree with me.

Nah. I need a nose job. And my skin look horrid… and my eyebrows are kinda manky and mingin.

Before I continue, please read the notice below.

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My date last night was my nonsexual wife (who is on the verge of being famous after being mentioned on some newspaper gossip column by the daughter of the (RIP) queen of Filipino showbiz intrigues called "DOLLY ANN"). I'm not really into local showbiz so I could care less. Anyway, Hannah you asshole, ride the fame darling! I'll tell you what someone told me in the past: ENJOY IT WHILE IT LASTS! IT'S YOUR MOMENT!

Our first stop was the decadent Absolut Vodka party. Absolut sent the invite to my office but I haven't been there in quite a while. It's only until this afternoon that I sent my driver to get all of my mail at the office. Everyone was dressed up to the nines… it was a masquerade event for god's sake and I have never felt sooo underdressed in my entire life… when often times, it's me who is usually OVERDRESSED!

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Hannah Matronic you bitch, who the fucking hell is THAT guy???? He's soooo cute and big!!!! You, moi and him should have a threesome! I want his cock up my fat ass! OOOOOH Daddy! Shit Hannah, when we become famous, we should get him as our bodyguard. We need a strong man like him to protect us from all the evils of Cosmo Manille.

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Oh my god!!!!!! I felt like a 15 year old again with raging hormones!!!! Come on daddy touch my fanny!

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Why take one photo when you can take 2? God he's soooo hot.

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Enough cute guys… the time will come when I get a man for myself. The time will come when I get my own gorgeous, tall, well-hung (at least 8 inches excuse me), wealthy man who will treat me like a princess and buy me Goyard bags left and right.

Anyway, let's play pictionary, shall we? Hannah and I were the youngest people at Absolut last night. The mathunders were in full force, fabulous outfits and all. It's nice to see acquantainces. Even my long lost friend of many, many years, Ariel, was there. Ditto with the Fashion Designer Lesley Mobo, who is currently the creative director of Al Fayed's daughter's line, Jasmine de Milo.

Remember my wife's dress on my 17th birthday party this year? It was designed by Lesley Mobo for Jasmine de Milo.

It's Donatella and child once again. Hahahaha!

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I will never forget that night when Lesley, Ariel, me, another designer Jojie Lloren and Filipina supermodel Joan Bitagcol went to two of London's infamous gay cruising/cottaging grounds other than Hampstead Heath hahahahahha (Russell Square and Bloomsbury Square Gardens)! Note:
HAHAHAHHAHA  I AM NOT INTO GAY SEX CRUISING! PROMISE! OMG. YOU GUYS MUST THINK I'M A DIRTY GAY SEX PERVERT! Those cruising grounds are hilarious to go to and it's fun to make fun of all these men having sex behind the bushes. It was soooo surreal! It was like AIDS factory right then and there!


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Joan, who is a woman (duh), had to don a ponytail so she won't scare all the guys having sex behind the bushes. It was absolutely hilarious! We went there many, many, many years ago, back when I was a child. No, none of us had sex. All we did was walk around the area and make fun of all the guys catching STDs etc.

Now now party party pictures… just what you've all been waiting for.

Thanks to the gorgeous Karla A, Fashion Editor of Philippine Tatler, my face looks squished on the photo. I LOOOOOVE Karla. Micro mini shorts showing off her fabulous legs is her daily uniform. I love you Karla!

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(Jacket by Gucci, button down shirt by Dolce & Gabbana, super old bamboo-print trousers from D&G, bag from Chanel)

Reason #451 that Bryanboy should lose weight, facial liposuction get a chin implant: I have a double chin when I hug people.

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American Express

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Love how Astrud did my infamous Bryanboy pose…

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Hannah and I went to Old Swiss Inn for a quick snack after the event at Absolut.


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Quick snack my ass. We had a FULL meal!!! I had some steak and a prawn/mango cocktail whereas Hannah had all these salami and risotto etc. No wonder we're getting fat.

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Guess who came for late night dinner? It's Rocky Salumbides, one of the Philippines' top male models.

Planning a trip to NYC?

Remember Rocky? I met him last year when a former friend and I went to Hong Kong for an impromptu shopping trip.  Rocky made me cry after telling me stories from his humble beginnings, considering not even starving children all over the world can make me feel remotely guilty after a credit card busting spree at Chanel… this guy is something else though. We spent god knows how many hours talking while I packed my Globe-Trotter suitcase with luxury goods… I literally had tears falling down my face when he told me his life story.

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It was definitely nice to see him. He sent me a text message one time inviting me to go clubbing but I was dead sick at home. Rocky is a realllly nice guy. He's sooo down to earth and friendly, unlike some of those arrogant mixed raced mongrel models that infest this city. He's like a big brother to me even if we don't get to talk or see each other often.

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After Old Swiss Inn, Hannah and I went to Embassy to meet up with Stacy. I guess people were still partying at Absolut. Cuisine and La Embajada was surprisingly empty. That place is jampacked on a Wednesday. And for the first time, I was DRY the entire night. I didn't even drop a sweat. At the end of the night, I was rubbing shoulders with Hannah asking her "bitch am i dry or what?". It was unbelievable. And to think, I even danced for a bit. I hope sweaty betty's gone away. Sweat is  absolutely disgusting.

Stacy looking fierce and Hannah looking good.

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Third world prostitutes at your disposable. We do foursomes for £250,000 per hour. I'm kidding!

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Too expensive? Alright… a bottle of cheap champagne and a kiss on my cheek will do.

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(T-shirt by Top Shop, oversized leather and lace white bag by Dolce & Gabbana, old "Italy Postcard" print trousers from Dolce & Gabbana, shoes from Zara and striped cardigan by La Rok)

Why the sad faces?

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Soooo drunk. Ugh!

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Overall it was a good night. The Absolut party was a blast! I love, love, love it!

Believe it or not I got home at around 4:30 but didn't go to bed until 7AM!

I'll update in a couple of hours. I gotta reply to a shitload of email.

As always, you know how to get a hold of me. Email bryanboy@gmail.com AND bryan@bryanboy.com. SMS +63.915.785.1492

Baboosh_3

Last call for survey responses. Deadline is on June 22, 2006! I've received 1,974 responses so far. Keep it coming! I'll announce the winners on Friday, June 23!

[pinit]
4:07 am

World… Hold on!

15/06/2006, Clubbing

World… Hold On!

It’s a little after 3AM and I’m back home, where high speed internet is a necessity, rather than a luxury. I just got back from a night’s worth of debauchery and "clubbing". I lost so much weight from dancing it’s unbelievable.

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The good news is… my parentals aren’t going through a divorce or an annulment. The bad news is, half of the people I "know" now are leaving in less than a month and I’ll be alone in this shithole. Yes, that includes my "nonsexual wife" Hannah Matronic. It’s amazing how I’m currently "hanging out" witha crowd that’s much younger than me… friends of friends whom I got to know recently and they’re all leaving soon because they’re studying in the USofA.

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I’m knackered to the bone and my breathe stinks of cheap champagne. I’ve got tipsy toes so I’m off to bed. I’ll do a proper update first thing tomorrow afternoon when I get up.

I’ve got lots of stories to tell. I’ve been out since 2 o’clock in the afternoon…

For instance, I ended the night by going to the bar to pick up my hat. I left it there because I spent an hour burning calories (by dancing). Ya should’ve seen how many gallons of sweat I released tonight. I must have lost at least a couple of kilos.

Anyway. I saw someone whom I used to see quite often. In fact, I used to hang out with him at least once or twice a week. We used to talk on the phone about all sorts of stuff though the last time I spoke to him was about 2 or 3 months ago.

I was chatting to a friend whilst walking to the bar and I saw him send a text message on his phone. I chatted to my friend to pretend I didn’t see him… and he did the same, though I KNEW he saw me too.

I asked the bartender for my hat, quickly left the bar with my friend, and called my driver. The guy whom I used to see/talked to at least several times a week was nowhere to be found.

I sighed with relief when my driver picked me up because the last thing I want to ahppen is play pretend and come up to him to say "hi". It would’ve been so sooo awkward to greet someone whom you used to talk to several times a week and then it all goes to a full stop for 2 or something months then you see him/her again.

Enough drama for now. i’m off to bed.
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I’m the luckiest guy in the world, am I? Funny how people always want what they can’t have. hey Mr. DJ CHAKA where are you? Funny how you didn’t show up on a Wednesday. It’s a good thing you didn’t show up otherwise I won’t be able to grab my wife’s ass! Hahahaha!

Anyway, I’m gonna hit the sack. I’ll do a proper post first thing tomorrow afternoon when I get up. Janthina you whore, email me pics… bryanboy@gmail.com.

In closure…

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and take note how I replied…

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I love you all! Email bryanboy@gmail.com or SMS +63.915.785.1492.

Time to get some shuteye.

Baboosh_3

PS. Discuss this blog post on my Online Discussion Forum.

[pinit]
11:03 pm

I Wear My Sunglasses At Night (and Today’s Youth)

08/06/2006, Clubbing

I Wear My Sunglasses At Night

*sings*

Even though the guys are crazy, even though the stars are blind, if you show me real love baby, I’ll show you miiiiiiine. I can make it nice and naughty, meet the devil and angel too, gotta heart, soul and body, let’s see what this love can doooooo… maybe I’m perfect for youuuuuuu!

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(Shirt by Kenneth Cole, sunglasses by Dior, jeans by Acne Jeans (Sweden), bracelets from Christian Dior and Hermès, belt from Hermès, shoes from Chanel, bag from Mulberry)

It’s been 2 days and I still have that stupid song on autorepeat. Ugh!

I went out yesterday night… the first time I went out on a Wednesday in the lonnnngesssst time.

CONTINUE READING

[pinit]
5:22 am

Excessively Preppy. Office Worker Chic. I mean Shit.

05/06/2006, Clubbing, Food and Drink, Friendships, Life, Manila

Excessively Preppy. Office Worker Chic

Boy oh boy, what an unbelievable weekend I had. It rained cats and dogs on Saturday night and it was pouring parties left and right. The awful H2O that fell from the sky didn’t stop my preppy-wannabe ass from hopping from one party to another.

I left the house at 7PM and it wasn’t even raining. As soon as I crossed the territorial borders of the big city with the bright lights, it started to pour. A friend called and even suggested that I should unleash the fur and the Jacket-a-wheelers cause it was pissing down with rain. Thank god I brought a Dior Homme dinner jacket with me.

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Super super drunk but I still look fierce. And fugly. Look at the face. Hahaha!

Too bad she called in late. I friggin wore a white top and beige trousers. Eeek! My dry cleaners will have a ball as soon as I send in my shit. LOL.

Hat by Chanel, top from Neil Barrett, fish necklace from Chanel, pearl belt (worn as necklace) by Chanel, faux pearls necklace from a flea market, B bag from Fendi, bracelet by Hermès, trousers by Prada, shoes from Louis Vuitton.

CONTINUE READING

[pinit]
12:41 pm

Mary-Kate, Ashley and Bryanboy Olsen, SUPER Summer Soles

28/05/2006, Clubbing, Fashion, Fun, Press Coverage

Mary-Kate, Ashley and Bryanboy Olsen

I’m sure everyone in this planet had committed some sort of a fashion faux pas at one point in their lives. While some do it more frequently than others, I, on the other hand, represent everything that is wrong in fashion. I seriously never cease to amaze myself on how I come up with the most ridiculous outfits/combinations ever.

Most people say it’s not about the clothes… it’s about attitude and how you "pull things off". Maybe it’s true. I didn’t know what I was thinking on Friday night when I went out… all I can say though is "FUCK YOU" cause money speaks and my little hideous ensemble is probably (just probably) more expensive than yours. Hahaha! God I’m such an asshole.

Anyway, enough ranting and let’s get down to business cause I know you’re all anxious to read what I’m up to.

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Me and the birthday boy, Dustin who looks sooo cute.

T-shirt by Dior Homme, oversized tank top by Ann Demeulemeester (underneath the tee), bracelets from Hermès, tights from www.welovecolors.com, bag from Chanel (Luxury by Chanel line), shoes by Mauri

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This is the look I want to achieve but the damn weather here is SOOOO nasty (hot and humid) so I skipped the jacket and wore a t-shirt and an oversized tank underneath instead… oh and one of our maids couldn’t find my black thights so I settled for blue. My maid Eunice isn’t back from her month-long vacation.

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I went to Absinth (I LOOOVE this bar) on Friday with a buddy to meet my friend Hannah and her friends. Little I had known it was the birthday party of this Dustin guy, who I only met once last week. I (unknowingly) gatecrashed his birthday party and I felt REALLY bad cause I’m not the gatecrashing type and I didn’t pay a single dime because the gracious hosts, Dustin and Christine, fed me with all the booze I can take.

The booze overflowed so who am I to complain? Even reformed alcoholics, people with cancer or fucked up livers won’t say no to free drinks.

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That Dustin guy is a hoot! I LOOOOOOOVE him. He told me that one can actually lose weight by eating UNSALTED and UNBUTTERED popcorn the entire day.

Après-Absinth, we went to Cuisine (at La Embajada) for more drinks and fun. I got so tipsy to the point where I broke my Dior Glossy sunglasses (my fat ass sat on it… proof that I REALLY need to lose weight).

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I swear to god it’s not a skirt. It’s an oversized tank top UNDERNEATH the t-shirt to cover my cock and my balls!

These are the Mauri of Italy shoes I used last night. I got these from Harrods back when I was 16 or 17 and I haven’t used them in YEARS. It’s amazing what kind of shit I find in my closet after all these years.

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The girl on the right is Monica. I suffocated with envy when I saw her stark white Chanel 2.55 bag. What is it with people snapping up those white 2.55 bags anyway? She’s like the umpteenth person that I’ve seen with a white 2.55 bag.

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I want one of those!!!! I really want one but I’m scared I’d fuck it all up with dirt in no time. Those white bags require extra TLC. Case in point: I completely fucked up my oversized US$2,300+ Dolce & Gabbana white lace and leather bag with pink lip gloss stains… and to think, I only used it about thrice. No more white bags for me.

I think the only way to keep a white bag in its original, pristine condition is NOT TO USE IT AT ALL.

God I look so red and drunk on this photo. And fat, too. Gotta love those Hermès enamel bracelets. For some strange reason, I haven’t seen too many people wear them. Hannah’s got the palladium-plated black one and I got the gold-plated white and the blue one. Everyone in this planet should have em. Those bracelets are wayyyy better than those nasty nasty kabbalah string. Those bracelets aren’t even that expensivo at $480 a pop and I’ve been monitoring Hermes.com almost on a monthly basis to see if they have new colors in stock. Someone just fucking bring Hermès to the third world for god’s sake.

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Look at the look on my nonsexual wife Hannah’s face. Only HANNAH FUCKIN MATRONIC has the balls to chase local third world actors and go nuts in front of them.

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Hannah, we gotta lose 20 fucking pounds your arms look as if they’re as big as his! What is wrong with us????? We’re all getting fat and we’re ageing disgracefully! WE NEED LIPOSUCTION, COCAINE AND CRYSTAL METH to get our 95-pound figures back!

Cuisine was fun! I’m so glad I went out the other night. I had sooo much fun it was overwhelming. I met a lot of very, very nice people (in spite of my scary Peter Pan outfit and alcohol-induced state). I was telling one of my friends, it’s great to have genuine fun with no pretentions or stress whatsoever.

OK, I lied.

The only stress that I had is the fact that I literally had NOTHING to wear the other night. I **NEED** to do some serious shopping once again. It’s funny how I bought so many clothes recently I haven’t even used them yet… I just need to find the right opportunity to do so.

SUPER Summer Soles

Lookie lookie at what I got in the mail yesterday. My friends at Summer Soles sent me a shitload of their fabulous stay-dry liners. I love how I get sent some goodies in the mail. Celebrities love swag… and since I’m a celebrity (hahahaha delusional cunt, that’s me), I love swag too!

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Don’t you just dread the feeling of sweaty feet? Let’s face it, not everyone in this planet got dry feet. I know at least a handful of boys and girls out there (like me) who got sweaty feet. There’s this girl who I know and she hated wearing thongs because her feet get so sweaty she constantly had to wipe her feet using tissue paper in between bathroom breaks so her toes won’t look icky.

Summer Soles are discreet peel and stick fabric liners designed specifically for stay-dry comfort in sandals, flip flops and almost all closed shoe fashions – are sure to become a style staple for those who don’t want to smack, slip or squish their way through the season.

These one-of-a-kind removable peel-and-stick fabric strips provide edge-to-edge shoe coverage, are completely removable with no sticky residue, and, for women come in a variety of color and fabric options (“Suede Softness” and “Ultra-Absorbent”) or, for men, “Ultra-Absorbent” fabric in the classic colors black and chocolate brown.  They accommodate up to ladies size 11 and men’s size 12 – simply snip the heel to size, peel and place.

I test-drove these liners on my my sky-high satin Lanvin cone heels that I got a few months ago. I haven’t used them yet because I’m saving them for halloween… the only time where it’s perfectly acceptable for a 17-year old boy like me to go drag without humiliating himself in public.

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Summer Soles’ stay-dry liners are THE END of squishy feet. Because I’m fabulous and you are, too, Summer Soles offers a 10% discount to ALL Bryanboy.com readers. To get your exclusive discount, you MUST enter the promo code BRYANBOY upon check-out and you must use the link below to purchase them. Feel free to pass this along to anyone that you know. For more information about Summer Soles, click the link below.

http://www.bryanboy.com/summersoles

Remember… you won’t get the discount if you don’t use that link or enter the promo code upon check-out. Summer Soles ships worldwide and offers $3 shipping wherever you are in the world.

I think that’s all for now. I REALLLLY have to work on my podcast. People are already bugging me, you know.

I love you all! Email bryan@bryanboy.com or SMS +63.915.785.1492.

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PS. Discuss this blog post here.

PPSS. Bryanboy loves Canada, too…. and people who go to Yale University. I like smart people.

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[pinit]