Detour Ahead. What’s The Next Step?

Written By bryanboy

Bryanboy in a bathtub, Shangri-la Hotel Sydney

Everything in this world has a shelf life.

The idea of me pecking away at the keyboard at three in the morning, sharing images of my tiresome self to internet folk when I hit my mid-thirties is cringe-worthy. God forbid I turn into one of them geriatrics desperately clinging to their fading youth, forcing themselves to keep up with the times.

No, seriously.

My biggest fear is to end up being that miserable, unhappy, bitter old queen who, at first glance, seem to have it all. No one knows that every night, he takes his mixture of two foundations, Maybelline and Nars, off, unveiling his face, his scars, his multiple nose jobs, botox, stitches and collagen… all in front of the mirror. He wraps his hair in a towel while he sings to “Stars are Blind” and thinks of what he’s gonna wear the next day — which Pologeorgis fur matches his gray, wide-leg Akris trousers, what haute joaillerie to wear with the latest Prada.

I don’t want that.

I always tell myself to simply go with the natural ebb and flow of things in order for me to have a felicitous life.

Thing is, I’m not one who likes to leave everything to good ol’ fate and destiny. I’ve said it many times over and over — I believe in creating opportunities for myself rather than waiting for opportunities to land on my lap. Dreams remain dreams if you don’t act upon them.

The universe, so far, has been incredibly generous to me. I think I’ve reached a certain point where I have most of what I want in life — a supportive family, a loving partner and a very loyal set of friends and business colleagues who unconditionally stand by me through thick and thin, warts and all. I have traveled the world and back. Times twenty. I’m also in a position where I can finally give back and I do. OK FINE, I don’t have enough expensive clothes but then again you can never have enough expensive clothes, furs, jewwwwwry and leather goods but in all seriousness, overall, I’m a happy camper.

AND NOW WHAT?

The problem is, I have so much energy, drive and ambition. I always have this never-ending desire to experience new things, to do more, to do better.

I feel like I need to do something really remarkable.

Every time I look at very successful people in the news, I always, always feel inferior because I haven’t achieved anything significant in this world.

So how and where do we go from here? I’m always up for a good challenge.

Answers on a postcard…

Photo via Sonny Vandevelde

28 Comments

  1. something yours (besides the blog of course)? maybe a brand? a style/image/branding consulting firm? helping out a young stylist you truly believe in and making him known throughout the world? you can do so much bb!!!! :)

  2. I love those deep posts of yours.
    The challenge is yours to discover or create and then to achieve. You have a strong voice and all the power thanks to your readers, fans and so called “followers” to do anything.

  3. BRYANNN OH MY GOD U ARE REALLY YOUNG AND U HAVE ALL THIS PROBLEM?? PLEASE. AS U SAID IN THE POST U ARE LEAVING AN AMAZING LIFE ! DON’T BE WORRIED , U’LL FIND A WORK IN FASHION FOR YOUR WHOLE LIFE . ANYWAY I’M SURE THAT U ARE ALREADY DOING HISTORY , U ARE ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT FASHION BLOGGER IN THE WORLDS , MAYBE STUDENTS WILL STUDY U IN 2150 . AND ANOTHER IMPORTANT THING , U ARE GAY BUT U EXPRESS UR SELF WITHOUT PROBLEMS . I WANT TO REMEMBER U THAT JEAN PAUL GAUTIER WAS CHASE FROM THE FESTIVAL OF CANNES IN 1982 FOR UMPROPER DRESS AND U ALWAYS WEAR MORE TRASGRESSIVE THAN HIM . EVEN IF U DON’T NOTICE THAT IN THIS PERIOD GLBT ARE MORE ACCEPPTED , U CAN SEE IT EVERYWHERE IN TV ( AS GLEE ) OR IN CINEMA. UR BLOG AND UR WORK IS MAKING HISTORY , TRUST ME BRYAN ;)

  4. Collaborations, your own brand, honing new talents like designers and bloggers, even charity work! Think Victoria B and Angelina J. :) Go Bryan! you can do anything

  5. THIS WAS INCREDIBLY HONEST, AND I’M GLAD YOU POSTED IT. I FEEL THE SAME WAY ABOUT MYSELF SOMETIMES WHEN I COME TO YOUR BLOG, SO I WAS VERY SURPRISED TO SEE THAT YOU FEEL THE SAME WAY ABOUT PEOPLE YOU ADMIRE. I BELIEVE YOU WILL BE JUST FIND, AND ENDLESS, LUXURIOUS OPPORTUNITIES WILL COME YOUR WAY. BLESS.

  6. This was a very brave and bold post and I applaud you for your honesty. I think you need to find something that you truly feel passionate about and when you do, the next steps will fall right into place. I’m a couple decades older than you but felt the same way when I walked away from a 20+ year career that was making me feel angry and unhappy. I found some volunteer work, doing equine therapy with special needs kids and it really changed my life and shifted my priorities. I hope that you will find something that will ignite your gifts as well. Thank you for your honesty.

  7. I guess we all feel inferior than others at one point or another, no matter how much we have or how much we have already accomplished. I understand your desire to do more, and that’s perfect. We all want to do more with our lives. So far, I think you’ve done an excellent work and you’ve come so far I can only see “success” written all over you and your life. I think it’s great you want to keep moving forward, so take the time to think what would be best for you and get to work ;)

  8. You’re doing so well at the moment, and I think that living in the moment is something you have to do. You’ve given people an insight into what can be achieved if you work bloody hard, and I thank you for that!

  9. WRITE A FUCKING NOVEL, A MEMOIR, OR WHATEVER! Put your meaningful and witty words into the pages of a book. PLEASE, YOU NEED TO MAKE IT HAPPEN!!! X

  10. REMIND ABOUT WHAT U HAVE DONE FOR THIS COUPLES CENTURY BRYAN, THERE WAS NO REASON FOR YOU TO BE BORDERED PERSON, BECAUSE EVERYONE KNOW YOU’RE UNSTOPPABLE! :)

  11. “It is said that the present is pregnant with the future.” Voltaire
    Here is your bright future Mr BB !
    In one year : fashion mentor on of these fashion reality related TV shows
    In two years :freelance fashion editor
    In three years :visiting teacher in a fashion college
    In four years :fashion forecasting
    In five years :partner in a lifestyle/fashion business with an international team of designers using your trademark.

  12. Wow, this post has so much in it… I am truly moved and I applaud u for being so true and honest in your feelings. Well ~~ u are truly influential blogger and one of the worlds’ best. Your fashion is your arm to make a point for yourself and i believe you can do more. You have so much energy and a lot to offer and i know there is a lot more projects, collabs and fashion etc in the future… So proud of u Bryan… Muaahhhh!!!

  13. Tani Bombeo

    INSULTED! i could not even buy a PRADA!!! lol. bb youre on the right track just be grateful and move forward.. God bless. =)
    xoxo

  14. Really appreciated this post.

    Uggghhh…One of the comments here was the response “But you are really young”….I am in the same (kinda) ansy position as you & people who say that to me “you are really young / you have time!” I really want to slap them.

    Like you, I have experienced (for good &bad) more than most people my age so, I dont FEEL so young. I understand so much your need to feel like you ‘accomplished’ something…because as i always think I may be young but sometimes i feel like I dont have that much time left (dont know why) so i need to get to it.

  15. I agree that with experience comes the understanding and you asking these questions can only mean you are ripe to do something special and important. Do you know what is the best motivation to work? Surprisingly it’s not profit. What motivates people is the purpose of their work. Look for something with a purpose and you will feel satisfied. iryna

  16. Your 27 not 57. Your in the prime of your life. You are living the dreams that hardworking 20 years hope to do when they hit their thirties. If you ask me you actually ahead of your time. You will be one of those individuals who will have the luxury of stating they have had several careers in their lifetime, all at which you will have been successful in. But I digress, everything does have a life expectancy with an expiration date, but when you have exceeded that self life you move on to bigger and better things. That’s all.

  17. I resonate with you’re feelings about the next direction one should take to further improve themselves, and ultimately become more successful in the next phase of life. I also would like to highlight, that since blogging has exploded, it has because the norm that every second person blogs. I feel the novelty has worn off. I have come to realise that yes, bloggers are inspiring and make my day more interesting but to what extent are they truly inspiring to young people?

    Just because they wear amazing clothes and a seemingly amazing lifestyle, that I am greatly jealous of, what have they really achieved in life? If today’s generation aspire to become a blogger and post ‘pretty’ pictures of they’re life, that seems somewhat self-demeaning.

    Yes, you’re young and you have achieved so much, but I guess what makes people more successful is when they take rein of their status. If you observe any successful person, what sets them apart, is they innovate, create new ideas, progressive and bring an entirely different perspective within their field of work.

    As a fan, I would personally love to see a collaboration with Rumi, both of you are powerful. I feel both you have ideas bubbling underneath the surface. This is entirely from an outsiders perspective.

    I’m just throwing brief suggestions here, but perhaps you two collaborate. I’m not sure exactly what direction to suggest, but perhaps revive a brand with both of your styling abilities, everyone loves a makeover of a brand. Take some sort of creative director position. To me that’s your strongest point. Or create a new website that shows you more on a intellectual level, I do enjoy your’e twitter posts, of course you have to further think about this. I personally wouldn’t want to see you design your own fashion label, it’s been done a 1000 times.One of pieces would be more enticing. Maybe your’e next step is in the print world, styling an editorial for a magazine would be very interesting too! Or curating a fashion show? I don’t have the best advice, as I am merely throwing ideas, but you have great contacts and a knack for creating innovative outfits. I think it’s time you start knocking on people’s doors.

  18. I would love to see a clothing line from you, that would be something to play around with and to keep you reinventing and trying new things. As if you haven’t already achieved anything with this blog…don’t downplay it. Clearly people love you! I think you’re awesome, w/e you decide I wish u the best.

  19. Bryan that post has really made me chuckle! I’m feeling exactly the same and hoping to come up with a plan of action!
    I’m super ambitious and I guess a workaholic but when you work in fashion isn’t that just the rule?:P I decided to set myself goals until I hit the big 3’0 I hope I can achieve them all and stop feeling so inferior :/ Keep at it your’ll get there!
    http://daniellejadewindsor.blogspot.co.uk/

  20. WOW! I love this like motto! I couldn’t agree with you more! its all about creating opportunities for yourself consistently which I blame for never being chill! But look how much amazing things you have achieved! you should be really proud! hopefully one day I can be too but for now I will continue to try :)

    -Monica

    http://www.lechicworld.com xo

  21. nice post bryan! ok lets see, I remember your pants which u made in india, they were fabolous! why not start with a trousers line? or I could really see you interviewing industry people, I mean after all most are your friends already, or do like makeover show for people who are jobless, help them get a job with your style input which makes them confidence..or bryans fashion guide of the world, you can do SOOO much, dont overthink it xxx stephanie http://streetstrut.com

  22. It seems to me that there is always an additional step, after our own personal ambitions and dreams, to satisfy ourselves, and that is to practice a spirit of charity, in small, everyday, unsexy ways which may not be noticed by anyone else, but will ultimately make complete our souls. This was a great thought-provoking post, and I can’t think of other alternatives to suggest, but if you do find one, let me know!

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