My aunt called my mom earlier this afternoon in a panic. She’s gonna play host to a foreign exchange student  for a few months. It’s her first time to host someone from overseas and she doesn’t know what to do. The kid arrived today and my aunt wants my mom to "help out" since my mum is no stranger to… aliens.

This is how the conversation went over dinner.

Me: What does she want now?
Mom: Your aunt is hosting an exchange student who’s arriving tonight.
Me: So?
Mom: She wants us to help out.
Me: What do you mean?
Mom: Show the kid around, hang out with him etc. You know there’s barely anyone at their house. Everyone is working and the only ones who are there are the help.
Me: Where is the student from?
Mom: Australia
(in my head: OHHHHHH.)
Me: Boy or a girl?
(secretly hoping it’s a hot jock!!!!)
Mom: Boy
(in my head: OHHHHHHH.)
Me: How old is he?
Mom: 15 or 16. I don’t know. 15.
(in my head: ok. fuggedaboutit. i hate children. dayum.)
Mom: What?
Me: Nothing.
(feigns ignorance)

5 minutes later

Me: Is he fat?