Boo hoo for Gisele. Yay for Tyra Chops

First things first… I KNOW I’M SUCH A PEASANT AND A PIG FOR SAYING THIS BUT HOW CAN YOU *NOT* MAKE THE EFFORT TO TAKE A STOLEN SNAPSHOT OF GISELE BUNDCHEN AT RAG & BONE? HELLO!!!! I DON’T CARE IF IT’S CROWDED BUT THAT GISELE IS… GISELE!!! SHE NEEDS NO EXPLANATION AND THAT BITCH IS WORTH $200+ MILLION AND YOU’RE LIKE WITHIN AN ARM’S REACH AWAY FROM HER? UGH!!!!!!! Hahaha!

My sincere apologies if I had to scream like that. I know, I know. I’m being silly again. I’m totally, totally, totally devastated!! Ok. *breathes* I also apologize to my fashion week homie for sharing this to my minions. I usually have morals (PROMISE!!!) and I’m capable of keeping secrets well, secret, but this is wayyy too good to keep to myself. Please forgive me!

Gisele Bundchen, Tyra Banks Rag & Bone

Tyra is fat? Tyra Chops looks really old? Tyra has crows feet for miles? OMG HOW DARE YOU TO SAY THAT ABOUT TYRA? I *LOVE* TYRA MORE THAN I LOVE KIMMORA!

Click click click click FOR TYRA CHOPS!

Gisele Bundchen, Tyra Banks Rag & Bone

I got anxious like fuck and three minutes felt like a lifetime. After all that build-up, this is what I got.

Ready?

Yes daddy!

Tyra Banks backstage at Betsey Johnson

Tyra Banks backstage at Betsey Johnson

Clearly you should’ve seen my disappointment. I was expecting Tyra Chops to look like Jocelyn Wildenstein after all that AIM drama but no, she actually looks human.

Tyra Banks

Don’t you just love a man who would rather thrust his cellphone towards Tyra’s face instead of Gisele’s? LOLers

Just kidding.

I love you all!