People always tell me I walk too fast. Whenever I’m with someone or a group of people, I’m usually several feet ahead of the pack and it’s not unusual for me to stop halfway and look behind me to see where they are.
While walking inside the mall (restaurant/cafe areas)…
Friend: I’m looking at people to see if they are looking at you.
Me: *beams with excitement* OMG I LOVE IT WHEN PEOPLE LOOK AT ME! Are there lots of people looking at me?
Friend: Not really, no.
Me: What, are they blind… immuned at my faggotry?
<30 seconds later>
Friend: Well, the waiters are looking at you.
OH SNAP! HAHAHHAHHAHHAH!