Bryanboy’s Big Ass Bonanza!

It’s a known fact that everything old becomes new again when it comes to fashion. Ladies of planet earth, I realized something quite shocking today!!!

Bryanboy's Big Ass Bonanza!
Bryanboy
Bryanboy's Big Ass Bonanza
I know it’s been too long but everyone on MySpace is doing it.

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In my butt. You wanna do it in my butt? In my butt. You wanna do it in my butt? In my butt. You wanna do it in my butt? In my butt. Let’s do it in the butt.

Get this…

Your grandmother’s grandmother’s grandmother’s grandmother’s mother would be ohhh so jealous of the ladies of today.

Remember the time in 1800s/Victoria era whatever when women wore bustles (thanks Chuvaness) to make their buttocks look bigger?

From Wikipedia: A bustle is a type of framework used to expand the fullness or support the drapery of the back of a woman’s dress, found predominantly between the mid- to late 1800s. Bustles were worn under the skirt in the back, just below the waist, to keep the skirt from dragging. Heavy fabric tended to pull the back of a skirt down and flatten it. Thus, a woman’s petticoated or crinolined skirt would lose its shape during everyday wear (from merely sitting down or moving about). The word "bustle" has become synonymous with the fashion to which the bustle was integral.

Bustle

Bustle: Lady in Red

Fast forward two centuries later, big butts are gaining momentum once again….

Feast your eyes on the return of the (AU NATUREL) BUSTLE!!!!!!!!!!

Remember J. Lo’s infamous butt that was allegedly insured for a BILLION donald duck dollars? Home girl from the block made a career out of her fanny.

Jennifer Lopez

Here’s Janet Jackson and her hideously huge bum…

Janet Jackson

Someone slap Jessica Biel’s butt cheeks, quick!

Jessica Biel

And who could’ve forgotten Serena Williams’ assets? I mean hello…. there’s large, there’s extra large, there’s extra extra large and there’s SERENA WILLIAMS!

Serena Williams

Kim Kardashian is one heck of an attention whore. What the hell was she thinking????????

Kim kardashian

And now this… lookie lookie at Delishis!!!!!

Delishis

Delishis

OH. MY. GOD.

Delishis

What’s with all these women and their hideously grotesque butts?

With butts as big as theirs, I can’t help but wonder how long does it take for their turd to fall into the toilet bowl whenever they poop.

Are their bodies sooo fucked up their uterus is located in their buttocks? Are they carrying siamese twins inside their butts? Jesus mother of god.

This is ridiculous. WAYYYYY ridiculous, I swear.

Here’s what I think what the perfect butt should look like — neat and nice, trim and tight, just like one of my fave models Hana Soukupova’s.

hana soukupova

hana soukupova

hana soukupova

hana soukupova

hana soukupova

Need I say more?

hana soukupova

Enough of this big ass bustle madness!!!

Email me and tell me you love me. My email address is bryanboy@gmail.com.

I love you all!