Bryanboy's Dream Job

Bryanboy's Dream Job

Written By bryanboy

Bryanboy’s Dream Job

I had an epiphany this morning.

I fucking found my dream job.

No, I don’t want to be a designer. I also don’t want to be a stylist, journalist, editor or a writer. And no, I definitely don’t want to be a manwhore.

Click click click!
(Don’t bother you have a slow internet connection)

I want to be a Victoria’s Secret model.

I’m dead serious.

I really want to be a Victoria’s Secret model.

I have to admit that I’m not really a big fan of Vicky.

Victoria’s Secret is EXTREMELY popular here in the third world especially amongst the masses, not for their loungerie or swimwear but for their body splash and toiletries.

I can’t even count the number of young Filipino girls who ask their relatives in America to send them bottles of spray-on liquid that smells like fruit air freshener. Yuck.


Photo credit: eBay

Anyway, I was browsing YouTube again for Naomi Campbell videos and after two hours of watching clips, I found myself watching last year’s Victoria’s Secret fashion show.

One of my super straight muscular broly friends from Australia sent me a message on msn.

Dan: what are you doing?

Me: watching the Victoria’s Secret fashion show. why?

Dan: why would you want to watch that?

Dan: VS is for girls you nincompoop

Dan: or for guys who want to fuck the VS girls

Me: well i don’t know why i’m watching it either

Dan: i like VS models more compared to other models. they’re not too skinny

Me: well bitch please. a lot of the models that you see on Vicky’s secret are former high fashion models who gone fatty patty boom boom. it’s usually the graveyard for models who are dunzo in Paris like karolina k, adriana lima or that ambrossio chick or tyra banks

Me: VS sometimes pay a lot of money to import the top IT girls to add to the mix like natasha poly or jessica stam

after a few minutes of explaining to a straight guy how "real" models are better than victoria’s secret’s brazilians, i had to switch to part 3 of the show.

YOU HAVE TO WATCH THE VIDEO. IT WAS TOO INTENSE, AT LEAST FOR ME. MAYBE IT WAS THE MUSIC?

BTW, I NEED THAT PARTICULAR REMIX OF THAT TRACK (WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG) BY THE KILLERS.

I got an electroshock treatment/electricity jolt out of nowhere when Karolina posed at the end of the runway and it didn’t stop there.

"AND KAROLINA?

GO!!!!"

Que another model I forgot the name. Alessandra Ambrosio?

Then comes MY favourite catwalker on the face of the planet, Natasha Poly.

GOD DAMN SHE’S SO FUCKING HOT. 

back to msn I sent a message to Dan

Me: ask me again why I’m watching th Victoria’s Secret fashio show

Dan: why?

Me: why what?

Dan: why are you watching VS?

Me: because I just found my dream job.

Need I say more?

13 Comments

  1. leleh

    GOOD GOD!…u finally changed that photo above!..that guy you were with is soo fuckin hideous! i dont know why you even chose that pic!@…i mean…hello???he’s zits are like screaming…where??just below his nostrils..sooo ewww….

  2. Hey BB,
    if you happen to get your hands on this remix of the killers “when you were young” please send this way too. I love the VS shows.. they’re intense and mesmerizing to watch. I think it was karolina.. lost her shoe and still walked fierce!
    SHARING IS CARING!

  3. billy

    (WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG) BY THE KILLERS–>it’s the “thin white duke remix”, sent it to you. enjoy!

  4. yanee`fashionee

    finally! u’re already paying attention to VS—the fashion show, of course, not the products. Aryt, I must admit that I, once got caught with the Victoria Secret fever here in my ever so loved country!
    anyway, LET’S FACE IT, The Victoria Secret Fashion Show is the most eerrr–whats the perfect word to use?!– ravishing?, alluring?,captivating?,seductive? or…. SEXIEST! “Sexiest fashion show in the planet.”, Indeeeed, it is. *mouth-opening* hahaha
    LET’S FACE IT, ladies & gentleman, dukes & lesbos and all of the envious creatures in the third world… LET’S FUCKING FACE IT,
    Everybody wants to be a Victoria’s Secret Model.
    Its always nice to watch the VS fashion show because it is the only fashion show where u seee stunning bitchie models in their lingerie enjoying their moment to strut down the runway SMILING, and they can only do this like… once a year! haha!
    One of the shows that I would love to see over & over again.
    I really really want to melt with Alessandra Ambrosio……….

  5. Kristof

    Bryanboy, I really now what you mean by saying the video is INTENSE. I can view it a thousand times but when the kelis music starts I secretly would like the runway to!
    It’s the best runway video ever!

  6. Jack MeHoff

    I pretty sure it’s Izabel Goulart after KK and not Alessandra.
    know. your. brazilian. models.

  7. vinnie.

    billy, that’s not the exact same remix.
    while no one knows what the real remix is, a DJ was frustrated he couldn’t find it either. so he made his own, which is surprisingly close to the one used in the show. download it here.
    http://www.isoterra.com/?p=10

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>