Impatience

Ugh. I’m starting to lose my patience. HAHAHA! Me? Patient? Bitch please.

As I’ve said before, the last time I had a haircut was around the first week of December. I usually get my hair done once a month… cut, colour and highlights and to be honest with you, I already miss the industrial-strength chemical fumes you’ll only find in a salon. I’m growing my hair long because I’m sooo sick and tired of the same old fucking haircut I get.

I don’t understand why it’s taking far too long to grow one’s hair. I really don’t get it. My hair is long, alright. I mean, it’s the longest I’ve had in the past few years — but it’s NOT long enough.

Y’all know the camera is my best friend and camwhoring is one of my favourite hobbies but at this point, my hair looks soo weird it’s affecting my confidence.

Don’t laugh but I’m starting to feel like one of those chubby fat kid pigs who lock themselves in their rooms and hide during family portrait/group shot when it’s Christmas time.

Anyway, here’s the back of my head. See how pitch-black (and long) my hair is. I want it a little longer. I look like a friggin emo kid at the moment without my cap. ALL I WANT IS LONGER, THINNER HAIR! I’m not asking for full-on, waist-length prostitute hair so it should be easy, right?

GAWWWWWDDDDD. It’s been 2 and a half months already! Now I know how it feels like for a butch, buzzcut-haired bulldyke to turn herself into a long-haired lipstick lesbian. It’s no easy feat!

Look at my nasty fat booty! Eeew! And my shoulders and my back, too. I look like a friggin bulldozer!

Hair problems aside, I’m sure you know my lifelong struggle in battling fat. There’s nothing new there. I simply just can’t keep the pounds away anymore. I seriously need an intervention. I don’t exercise, I don’t want to exercise, I’m scared of surgery, I forced myself to starvation (and back), I’ve tried every diet under the sun out there, every pill. What else is there to do? I have biceps for god’s sake. BICEPS! I never had that before and now I fucking have it! The next time I go to the doctor’s I’ll ask if there’s a way to get rid of em. Soo unnecessary and disgusting.

I’ve been spending time at my grandma’s house because the old lady wants company. She’s currently redecorating her home and I’ve been helping the old lady here and there.

Ok. I’m kidding.

Like I’m gonna do manual labour. All of the blue collar workers are piss fugly and mingin’!!! 

All I do is sit there, watch tv, rack out her phone bill and pig out hahaha! I’m kiddin.

I took a break from my grandma’s insanity and thought I’d pamper myself yesterday. Nothing beats a good ol’ massage, manicure, pedicure, foot/leg scrub, facial and a powerpeel session.

Fattie fattie fattie! LOSE WEIGHT, FEEL GREAT! I need to lose 15-20 pounds.

Today’s Obligatory Paparazzi Shot

Tomorrow’s gonna be a busy day. I’m just soo swamped! Ugh! I have a lunch meeting to go to and I need to go to the shops to see if the shoes I want from Tod’s came in.

also need to escape for 2-3 weeks. No cellphone reception, no TV, no internet, no people, no nothing. It has to be beautiful and REMOTE. There’s just soo many distractions everywhere! I really want to finish my little book project so I can send it to my editor blah blah blah.

Email me and tell me you love me. My email address is bryanboy@gmail.com or SMS +63.915.785.1492.

I love you all!