Do you want chic? I'll give you chic.

Written By bryanboy

Do you want chic? I’ll give you chic.

I’m sick of superficial shit. Seriously. There used to be a time in my life where I got soo obsessed with fashion I got all the names of the designers, models, photographers, editors etc (AND ALL OF THEIR WEIGHT/HEIGHT/memorized, I used to buy magazines by the ton, spend 18 hours a day looking at Style.com, troll away at various forums and all that bullshit. And then I had a wakeup call. What is the point of it all? It’s only fashion. Why should I be obsessed and delude myself into thinking I belong to the great ol’ fashion circus? And with all the hoola balloo crap going on at the moment where people are wearing black and playing it safe, my gawd, can it be any more dull?

You want black? I’ll give you black. You want dull? I’ll give you dull. You want understated, I’ll give you understated. You want to abolish logos? I’ll abolish logos (it’s amazing how I manage to turn myself from the biggest logoagagogo manic whore to the lookmumnologosbitchcuntasshole that I am now… it’s hard but I managed. my next goal? I want to weigh 50 pounds, by hook or by crook). You want chic? I’ll fucking give you chic.

One thing is for certain — I’M THE ONLY PERSON IN THE WORLD WHO CAN MAKE A DOG TAKING A SHIT LOOK BEAUTIFUL.

And I fucking mean it.

Cha-ching, cha-ching, cha-ching!

Oh and don’t ask me what I did with the poop. Let the powers that be clean it. That’s why we fucking pay taxes. Last time I checked, shit is biodegradable and they turn it into compost/fertilizer. Frankly, the environment could do with a lot of shit.

I took my beagle, Titikaka, out for a spin yesterday afternoon cause I was soooo bored out of my skull. One of my friends had lots of errands to run and she didn’t mind me tagging along so I thought, why not take the dog out? It’s always nice to have a little bit of exercise here and there. Afterall, both the dog and moi need to lose weight really bad. And we both ran out of laxatives.

Look at my facial expression on this one. LOL.

Insular.

Life.

HAHAHA.

Do you like my pole? Titikaka likes it. Bestiality for the mother fucking win!

We all know I douche with Evian before engaging myself in anal sex. I really don’t like the idea of getting my shit on somebody else’s dick when they pull their cummy cock out of my shithole. What do I do if there’s no Evian at my disposal? Tap water. Ta-da!

I hate my legs! I really hate being clinically obese. *sigh*

Faggotry in motion. God I look so chic. Don’t you agree?

Look at all the commoners behind me! They all look festively plump. I SEE HIPS! I SEE THIGHS! I SEE BUTTOCKS! I SEE CELLULITE! Soo hot and sexy. Good thing all I ate for Christmas is a tablespoon of raisins. Look who’s laughing now, bitches.

I see the light at the end of the doggie tunnel!!!!!

Remember kids, try my new diet. I highly recommend it. Buy half a kilo of crystal meth from the supermarket, mix it with 1 cup of water, put it in a sauce pan and boil it. When the whole thing goes into smoke, inhale, inhale, inhale. Good luck if you’re still alive (and fat) after you do it. If that falls, try my 1 tablespoon of raisins + 1 diet coke = lunch/dinner diet. It’s super duper effective.

As always, I love you all. Email me and tell me you love me. My email address is bryanboy@gmail.com or SMS +63.915.785.1492.

48 Comments

  1. Jacinda

    Your puppy is sooo cute!! I have a male beagle and maybe they could fuck and have little beagle babiessssss

  2. We all know I douche with Evian before engaging myself in anal sex. I really don’t like the idea of getting my shit on somebody else’s dick when they pull their cummy cock out of my shithole. What do I do if there’s no Evian at my disposal? Tap water.
    ========
    LOL!
    U damn hilarious B!
    love ya, and INHALE INHALE those crystal meth! :P
    baboosh!

  3. oh my is that really you?
    you look fantastic!
    you are my new thinspriation!!!!!

  4. Young girls that are equally weight obssessed as you will look like shit and die. Be a little responsible. You don’t want mommies protesting against you and signing petitions against you.

  5. Where r Balenciaga ankle boots to go with that outfit Bryanboy?
    Where r Balenciaga ankle boots to go with that outfit Bryanboy?
    Where r Balenciaga ankle boots to go with that outfit Bryanboy?
    Where r Balenciaga ankle boots to go with that outfit Bryanboy? lol

  6. I find this new look rather disturbing. Get some fucking burger, you anorexic beatch!

  7. jamie SFO

    Brilliant photos, BB! You look sophisticated and chic. I’ve been reading your blog for over a year and this is one of your best looks. Keep up the good work!
    xoxo
    Jamie
    San Francisco

  8. Bry, man, you really have issues…
    You and this site isn’t so cute anymore.
    I’m going to have to replace you.

  9. omg! omg! omg! you are sooo thin!!
    is the raisin/diet coke regimen real?
    coz i wont think twice to recommend that to my friends.. not me coz don’t have plans of losing weight for now.. hehehe.. but someday i will..
    i love bryanboy! =p

  10. YOU NEED TO GO TO A DOCTOR YOU SKINNY FREAK! YOU’RE ONE BREATHE AWAY FROM DEATH AND YOU LOOK DISGUSTING!

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  12. God, this is a freakshow. Where has all the love and humor gone to? U BUMFUCKS. Sharpen up with the comments, folks.
    And by the way. Swedes takes it very seriuosly when people don’t clean up the crap from their pets. Shame on you.

  13. fafagest

    YOU LOOK GORGEOUS!!!!!
    Don’t listen to all of those FAT ASSES telling you stupid things about your SUPER CHIC-THIN LOOK! thin is in, FAT always be out!
    You are super skinny AND I LOVE IT!!!! you look rich, sophisticated, tall, you name it! you look GREAT!
    CONGRATZ!!!!

  14. Bryanboy you’re sick! I’m disappointed with you. I visit your site every day because you’re witty, you have a way with words, you’re talented and you’re funny. You also don’t take yourself seriously. However, your recent photos show that you’re being anorexic for real.
    Eating disorders are not cool. They kill thousands of people every year. It’s ok to joke about being fat from time to time but you’ve gone way too far this time. You are not fat and you know it.
    Have you ever thought of seeking professional help? I’m only saying this out of concern and for you to take care of yourself.
    Think about it.

  15. YOU LOOK FANTASTIC!!!! I love your blog even more!!!!
    ROCKING ON BRYAN!

  16. titikaka is the coolest name ive ever heard! LOL! where is that place taken? it’s like the street is all yours! haha! what the fuck are you wearing btw? i can see your thin legs! LOL! see ya later

  17. On second thought, scratch my last email. If you don’t care about yourself and getting this website back to being witty, creative and innovative, then I (we who ARE complaining) don’t give a dayum about you anymore.
    GO ‘HEAD AND DIE THEN, BECUZ SOONER OR LATER YOU WILL!!!! This is a waste of my emotions and bandwith!!!

  18. james j

    you’re so non photogenic, it must be a disaster to be into fashion that much, kinda like a diabetic chief or something, poor you loser fuck

  19. what is up with the bitch fits?! please. bryan is not too thin. the top is just oversized which makes him look thinner. everyone who is into clothes knows that. so please.
    anyway, i LOVE the look. so fucking chic especially the pedestrian lane shots. super fucking gorgeous.
    james
    literarybulimia.blogspot.com

  20. Absolutely Fabulous
    Absolutely Fabulous
    Absolutely Fabulous
    Absolutely Fabulous
    Absolutely Fabulous
    Absolutely Fabulous!!!!

  21. come on now, bryanboy! those photos are so obviously photoshopped, it’s not even funny!

  22. disturbed

    Bryan, darling… this is my first time on your site… strangely disturbing- what disillusioned fantasy world do you reside in, where you actually perceive yourself to look.. ahem… beautiful?! I’m into thin guys but you- i thought you were an incredibly ugly girl. muscle looks much better sporting fashioniable garments than a walking gender confused coat hanger. and dont get carried away with your anorexic thing- it cant last, you will die, or be shipped of to hospital by the authorities- or the nuthouse, depending. I’ve been there, done that, though not the nuthouse part obviously. after my bitchy tyrade Bryan, let me say that i am truly, sincerely going to pray for you to regain your sanity.

  23. How do you douche? i wanna get bumfucked but dont know how to douche nd dont wanna shit all over some guys cock. hollaback biznatch.

  24. God, I wish I were as skinny as you. Please don’t lose any more weight though, babe. Seriously. And is this seriously the result of raisins and diet coke? I’m totally trying it haha

  25. God, I wish I were as skinny as you. Please don’t lose any more weight though, babe. Seriously. And is this seriously the result of raisins and diet coke? I’m totally trying it haha

  26. um, you’re amazing, and i wish i were as thin as you. i know it’s unhealthy, and i hope you take care of yourself, but i’m not going to lie- i’m jealous. so the raisins and diet coke actually work? :)

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