2468 Diet: We want this NOW!

Written By bryanboy

2468 Diet: We want this NOW!

Que horror! Tonight, my friends, I realized I’ve hit rock-bottom… a record low high.

[BTW, BEFORE WE CONTINUE ANY FURTHER I’VE BEEN RECEIVING REPORTS THAT MY PAGE IS FUCKED UP/OUT OF ALIGNMENT WHATEVER. IS IT TRUE??? GIVE ME A SHOUT OUT IF YOU’RE HAVING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES, MMMKAY????]

Guess who I spoke to earlier this evening via Ouija Board?

It’s no other than Ana Carolina Reston!!!

I have never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever infinity EVER weighed so much in my entire life!

I’m sure you’ve noticed that I haven’t really photographed myself wearing a t-shirt or tank top lately because of all the disgusting flesh I have on my body.  I’m such a heavyweight champ! With the body that I have at the moment, I should just quit blogging altogether and move to Japan to start a career in Sumo wrestling! I’m a fat, disgusting pig!

I’ve heard every single fat person joke out there. People have called me a fat cow. British guys told me I could fly with my bingo wings.

Heck, I even have this bunch of American faggots on a forum ask each other how a fag like me have “bitch tits”.

I know, I know, here I am wasting away and complaining how “fat” I am… well, whatevs. Let’s not even go there.

It really is my fault. All I do is eat, eat, eat. I ate so much the past year – I ate anything AND everything edible. I also indulged (frequently, if I may add) on fast food. Back when I was really really thin, I NEVER EVEN DRANK SOFT DRINK LET ALONE EAT FAST FOOD.

So I thought, shit… I really need to clean up my act and get my shit together.

This time for real.

A friend from Stockholm told me about this newfound diet not too long ago and I’m going to be on it starting tomorrow. I’ve tried soo many diets in my time and they all failed me. Remember my watermelon diet? Anyway, I thought I’d share this with you – it would be interesting if you do it with me. You know, birds of the same feather flock together.

My new diet is called “2468”. I’ve spent the past two weeks researching about it and it seems effective. Based on the feedback I got, you really lose a lot of weight – FAST!

According to my research, it originally came from LiveJournal’s 9000+ member-strong Pro-Anorexia support group. "2468" involves severe calorie restriction so it’s quite rigorous and you really need a lot of discipline. It has been reported that you can lose as much as 5 pounds in 1 week alone. Some say you can lose 10 pounds in 1 month if you follow it religiously. I don’t care. The most important thing is that I lose fat.

It’s a known fact that our bodies lose “water weight” at the start of a diet/fast and some people say that we gain it all back after a while because our metabolism slows down. However, with the 2468 diet, you’re actually ‘tricking’ your metabolism to keep on guessing – a good way to keep unwanted weight away.

What’s the 2468 diet then? Well… it’s quite simple.

Day #1 – Eat a maximum of 200 calories
Day #2 – Eat a maximum of 400 calories
Day #3 – Eat a maximum of 600 calories
Day #4 – Eat a maximum of 800 calories

and keep repeating the cycle until you reach your goal weight.

The challenge lies in finding what sort of food can fit within the calorie limits.

This is where my new BFF comes into place. There’s this website called “Calorie Count” and you may find it at www.calorie-count.com. That site has the most comprehensive online listing of foods… and the calories associated with them.

I guess I have to REALLY look at that dreaded "nutrition facts" label on every single thing I consume from now on.

I know it’s a little hardcore but when you think about it, I lead a pretty sedentary lifestyle. I have almost zero exercise and all I do day-in/day-out is sit in front of my computer.

I’ll prolly allow myself 1 “binge” day a week but keep it to a maximum of 1,000 or 1,500 calories MAX. We’ll see. The most important goal really is for me to radically change my nutritional habits COMPLETELY and get away from my late night snacking and my soft drink and fast food obsession.

It’s gonna be a lifestyle change, I’m telling you!

When you think about it, the main reason why I snack too often is my lack of a real, real “schedule” and my fucked up body clock. I sleep when I’m tired – sometimes I’d sleep for 4 hours… sometimes I’d sleep for 12 hours. It’s terrible!

In any case, I’ll give this new a diet a shot… at least for the next couple of weeks.

The problem lies with the fact that I have short attention span so this is where I’ll need your help.

I’m looking for someone (or a group of people) who are willing to commit to this little “project”. You know, like a little support group. We’ll virtually hold each other’s hands as we embark on this battle against fat and excess weight. We’ll do the 2468 diet together and provide each other non-judgmental support when we need them.

The best part is, we can make fun of fat people too.

Either way, the decision is yours.

You need to choose to get ahead.

And don’t be ridiculous Andrea, everybody wants this. Everybody wants to be us.

If you are SERIOUSLY interested *AND* willing to join my little diet club starting tomorrow, just shoot me an email at bryanboy@gmail.com. I’ll give you my private MSN where we can chat from time to time.

011407_wallis My friend from Stockholm will do this with me but it’s always fun to have more people join the bandwagon. The more the merrier!

Wallis Simpson said it best bitches: you can never be too rich or too thin.

Being poor is terrible.

Being fat is bad.

Being poor AND fat is the worst. You might as well just stab yourself in the chest with a kitchen knife because really you have no use in this planet.

I’m kidding!

BTWWWWWWW

LET IT BE KNOWN TO THE WORLD THAT….

Y’all know I’m an equal opportunity lover and I love people regardless of their body size, weight or cock girth. But when it comes to me — as in my OWN body — I want to be as thin as a matchstick!

On that note, here’s my diet plan for tomorrow, Monday, January 15, 2007. It’s 10:26PM on a Sunday night. I think I’ll go to sleep early today, like, no later than 1 or 2AM.

IF I CAN DO IT THEN SO CAN YOU!!!!

Here’s what that Nido Oriental Style soup thing looks like. You can get your maid to cook it for you — all they have to do is pour all that powdered shit in boiling water, add 1 egg, wait for a few minutes and voila… soup!

Let’s rewind the clocks and take a stroll down memory lane.

John Galliano would have been so proud of all the bones sticking out on my chest. Tell me you love it.

I’m soo digging the gaunt look on my face. Look at the chest oh yes the chest. GORGEOUS! Who’s got the bitch tits now betch?

Thin is very beautiful.

Cheekbones for the mother fucking win!!!

Ooooh la la! The waist and the jawline…

Remember May of last year?

REPEAT AFTER ME: THINSPIRATION!

Because thin is VERY beautiful!!!!

Last but not the least, a few reverse triggers for you guys, just for visual pleasure.

Email me and tell me you love me. My email address is bryanboy@gmail.com. SMS +63.915.785.1492.

I love you all! I really do! I’m only concerned about your welfare and well-being so I think we should all join our hands together VOLTES-V on this big worldwide battle against obesity.

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30 Comments

  1. Ugh… that guy in the striped socks with the huge tits scares me a bit. I’m going to have nightmares now. Thanks. LOL.

  2. twinkletoesonspeed

    sweetie, doesn’t nido oriental soup have oodles of MSG? i read somewhere that it largely contributes to a person getting splitting headaches.
    if ever though, when you do add one egg like what the packet says, make sure you only add the whites, since the yellow’s not that good for you.
    good call on the oatmeal. it’s a good source of fiber and you’ll feel full for hours. =D you know ahlavya!
    much lurve!

  3. Lionel RichTea

    I’d join but I’m already at my goal weight.
    PS, the site looks fine to me. The alignment is perfect.

  4. Yawn! Always the same thing.
    Very Old!
    You are worst than a cliche!
    Hahaha
    You Go Orka!

  5. Coco Crakk

    I have found that 1000 cals a day works best for me. I am a fierce calorie counter, so its all love. I just dont eat out, except for special occasions, and cook my own food, keeps me very conscious of exactly how many calories are in what im eating.
    And the PRO-ANOREXIA Group is my love. I have been a member for a couple months, and the girls and boys of the site are great support.
    Stay strong, LOL…You are a mess. If you really want to lose weight, go vegetarian. Stop eating red meat, pork, poultry. The pounds will ZOOM OFF!

  6. do the dorm room diet. (it’s a book)
    i’ve lost about seven pounds and it’s only been 1 1/2 week and it doesnt have any calorie restrictions :)

  7. Nina D' Lizard

    If you should eat egg, have it boiled yes and eggwhites only. No Nido Soup, too high sodium, water retention my dear. I agree with your Oatmeal, but put in for lunch or breakfast. Eat fruit (apple 60kal) at night. Cheers! Good luck!!

  8. silverback

    ur correct, you have alignment problems in your blog. anyway, thanks for ur 2468 diet advise.

  9. Yikes! Warn people first please.
    (Not out of alignment but some weird shit definitely is going on.)

  10. I love your bathroom, Bryan! It screams opulence;). the black-and-white tiling by your tub is fabulous!

  11. Amanda K

    Bryan….
    I’m going to try the 2468 thing with you…. It’ll be hard, but i KNOW i can do it!!!!!
    THINK THIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  12. okay, first of all…you’re not really fat…You actually look normal. And besides, the uber thin thing is really scary…BUT, after seeing the OTHER pictures below, God knew everyone SHOULD starve themselves and enjoy size zero trousers and xxxxxsmall shirts…Go do Emily’s diet…eat nothing and when you feel like fainting, eat a cube of cheese…Hahaha…
    ~Paw

  13. nina d’lizard is right. that instant stuff is horrible because of the sodium, and usually preservatives and msg. never skip breakfast either, since it jumpstarts metabolism for the day.
    don’t forget to keep track of vitamins and minerals too. you wouldn’t want your skin to suffer or hair to fall out while trying to restrict calories.

  14. You should buy a calorie counter book. I’m in Toronto got mine at a local bookshop. Its a small book packed with everything you need to know about calories and food. I carry it around with me with my food journal like a bible. Mine was authored by Natow & Heslin and I find is really easy to use. I’m gonna 2468 with you!!! I feel so fucking fat!!! I was doing so well and binged on 4 cookies today!!!! ARGH!!! I hate my stupid mouth for wanting to eat shit like that (NOTE 210 calories per cookie!!!)

  15. Six months ago, dieting and calorie counting are my hobbies. It’s like a game or an easy-win bet with my own body. But after regaining all the weight i’ve lost, I’ve become bitter with myself. The more I get bitter, the more I ate bad foods. So, my advice, when you start, DON’T EVER EVER EVER STOP, coz it’s frickin hard to go back. Make it a LIFESTYLE, a permanent one. After reading this post, bryan…I think I’m gonna try again, but this time I’m going to succeed( alright, we can do this! ).
    Oh, another thing…calorieking is much bigger than calorie-count. And sparkpeople is also a nice site that let’s you record your calorie intake.

  16. I just went to your 2468 site, but I can’t comment coz I have no account…Hey, we’re almost the same weight, and my goal weight is exactly the same as yours! Tomorrow is my 1st day (200 cal). I’m going to religiously follow your 2468 posts. I wanna reach 90 lbs on the same day that you do. Yeyyy, I feel more determined now!

  17. I just went to your 2468 site, but I can’t comment coz I have no account…Hey, we’re almost the same weight, and my goal weight is exactly the same as yours! Tomorrow is my 1st day (200 cal). I’m going to religiously follow your 2468 posts. I wanna reach 90 lbs on the same day that you do. Yeyyy, I feel more determined now!

  18. whatevah happened to watermelon diet…..im just fucking tired of ur weight issues

  19. That instant soup thing is really bad for you.
    Try this (still kinda unhealthy diet) instead. I call it my noodle shop diet regime/lifestyle. For every meal, you must eat (either at or prepare it yourself) something from a Chinese/Cantonese noodle shop. Wonton noodles, beef brisket noodles, etc. Only one bowl. For rice dishes, only one plate. The rule of ONE. Have veggies on the side, cause veggies are ALWAYS okay, just not too much sauce (soy sauce or hoisin sauce or whatever always has too much salt, which is baad).
    Chinese noodle shop foods, like most East Asian foods rank high on the glycemic index. That’s why you feel hungry faster after a Chinese dish, because it digests fast. While this is “bad” because your blood sugar spikes after each meal, you won’t be allowed to eat again till the next meal time and so you’ll have digested everything (and most likely burned away more) by the time of the next meal.
    For a more moderate/healthy version of a GI diet, go for the low GI foods.

  20. i have this new diet called never eat anything and sometimes a cup of tea.
    or the cube of cheese/almond thing, that works too.

  21. Pleace write me back!
    I need help and want to start that diet.
    Want to get exactly like nicole richie or the others!
    im waitting for your message!

  22. Lindsey

    i’m in to.. but remember to watch the fat in the food to.. fat turns into calories.. i find 2 grams of fat a day works for me.. so far in the past week i’ve lost about 6 pounds…
    keep up the good work
    Linds

  23. shanny.xoxo

    hi
    im going to start the 2468 diet today i’ve bin thinking about it for a while and i actually going to start it today(:
    i suffer with bulimia so it maybe really hard but im going to stick at it because i feel i need to lose alot of wieght.
    xoxo

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