Obsession du Jour: Ballando con le Stelle
Ah… the wonders of good ol’ cable TV. It’s really is amazing how we get Italian TV shows in my little corner of the third world. I normally have ZERO tolerance when it comes to watching shows in languages other than Ingles (heck, I don’t even watch Filipino TV shows.. I’d rather watch Fashion TV instead) but this… this Ballando con le Stelle is something else.
The grandeur and lavishness of the set, all those bright lights, the gorgeous, gorgeous (and well-dressed) audience — nobody does it better than those damn Italians!!
I loooove Ballando con le Stelle!
Basically it’s this TV show in Italy where random people get paired off with other random people to dance.
I’m just disappointed with the outfits though. One would expect these idiots dance in their finest Dolce & Gabbana, Fendi or Cavalli but all the males are look as if they shopped from the International Male Catalog. They all look like manwhore gigolos!!!! HAHAHAHA!
Here’s what some of them look like before the competition. I LOOOOVE RAIMONDO TODARO! I WANT HIS BABIES!!!! Blondes are soo last year and I really mean it this time!!!!!!!! NOTHING BEATS a tall, dark-haired Italian man! In fact, I think we should ALL get ourselves a fine, good-looking Italian man. They’re wayyyyy sexier than any other bastard out there. Shit, I can’t even remember how many Italians fucked my poop chute before but yeah, Italians are good in bed.
Here’s my other favourite, Biagio Izzo. He’s a great dancer. He’s kinda old but there’s something dirty and sexual about him that screams ‘daddy can i stroke your chest?’. He kinda reminds me of Robert de Niro.
Look at this other contestant… she’s a cross between Nicole Richie and Donatella Versace. The guy she got partnered with is a personal trainer… funny how he’s oh so macho but as soon as he went dancing on the floor… BAM WHAM BAM, no amount of polyester can save his masculinity…
Since I have many, many readers in Italy, maybe someone out there can help me out?
I **MUST** KNOW THE NAME OF THIS GUY!!!!!!!!!
Gawddd… isn’t he fucking grogeous?
Never mind the jealous faggot and the barbie slut next to him.
Here’s one of my favourite teams, Fiona May and Raimondo Todaro. This Raimondo guy is soo cute.
I don’t like this Massimiliano guy that much. He’s too big, brolly, tall and blonde.
A haircut, a shave and an outfit change later…..
CHA-CHING! CHA-CHING! CHA-CHING!!!!!
The 5 contestants… those two kids, Pinto + Gaudino, are amazing cause they’re competing with adults…
Here’s my other favourite, Izzo + Samanta Togni. Samanta is sooo prettty!!!! Italian girls are fucking gorgeous! I think I was a naughty, very naughty Italian girl on my previous life that’s why I reincarnated to a fucking fat, brown ricer gay boy’s body. Ugh!
Look at those cheekbones!!!
Edit: This guy’s name is Umberto Gaudino. This blogger said everything you need to know about this guy. "Umberto Gaudino, who is 15 and the weirdest looking kid I have ever seen. He is bright orange with fake tan, and dances like a couple of rubber bands. He’s very creepy!"
Now that’s what I want to see on TV, not all the crap that I see most of the time.
Remember kids… TRY TO GET YOURSELF AN ITALIAN MAN SOON. Afterall, it’s always nice to get packages from Fendi, Missoni, Cavalli, Marni, Versace and Dolce & Gabbana on Christmas day.
On that note, I’ll leave you with this.
Email me — firstname.lastname@example.org or SMS + 63.915.785.1492 and tell me you love me.
I love you all, as always!