I’m exhausted!!!! It’s Thursday already and I can’t believe the weekend is just around the corner.
My dad is right — time is definitely the ultimate luxury in this world. Why can’t I have the luxury of time? I am literally swamped with projects to the point where I don’t even have time for MYSELF.
I can’t even remember the last time I had a facial and a peel. What, two weeks ago? Oh I don’t know. My skin is seriously fucked up. I’m growing yet another acne farm and my all my nails are crappy. I also owe myself a good massage. I can’t believe I’m neglecting myself for the sake of work but there’s just so many things to do, so many commitments to fulfill and so many promises to keep.
One of my serious flaws is the inability to say "no!". Right from the start, I have this tendency to accept everything that comes my way. It’s sad, really, considering I put myself into a vulnerable position where I overpromise and under deliver.
I find this whole thing funny because most people don’t really know what’s wrong with them unless they commit a mistake whereas I, the fluffer from Planet Mars, know ALL my (often recurring) problems right from the beginning but I’m just not proactive in avoiding (or rectifying) them. What can I say other than I’m a stubborn bitch?
Oh I don’t know anymore. I seriously feel like a zombie. I must have been online 16 hours a day, every day for the past week or something. No wonder I’m getting fat… All I do is use the computer and pig out excessively. I don’t even burn calories! My body requires some form of movement to burn all those nasty calories and the only time I’ll get off the keyboard is whenever mother nature rings the excretion bell.
There’s just sooo many things that has to be done. I need to finish my accessories website in 3 days… AND I HAVEN’T EVEN STARTED YET! I’m dying to get this thing off my plate because it’s just taking so long. I need to recoup my expenses somehow. I’ve spent far too much money on the collection, everything from the materials to packaging. EVERYTHING! I even ‘invested’ on the boxes and had a photographer to shoot them.
I just want everything to be perfect. Hahaha! Well, one can only try hard to be perfect.
I even wanted my boxes to be hotstamped with my logo but there’s really no time. I think I’ll do it on my next collection.
I’m need to be *IN* control of MY life. I really do.
I think I’m gonna stay away from the internet for a bit, get on with the program and get some real life action.
I’m going to the office supply store tomorrow to buy boxes, bubble wrap and peanuts. I’ll also pay the Post Office a visit (which I’ve been putting off for the longest time) to get shipping rates.
I’ll have a nice lunch somewhere, followed by a quick look at the cosmetics counter to buy some body scrub and a couple of new fragrances. I’ll even go to Bottega Veneta either for a "2nd viewing" or to just throw all financial caution to the wind and buy that nice black bag that I saw last weekend. It’s gorgeous! It reminds me of my brown Tod’s bag several years ago.
Anyway, the bag that I want is exactly the same style as the photo on the right but it’s all black. If I’m not mistaken, it’s called the "Cervo Cocker" bag. Photo courtesy of Saks Fifth Avenue.
We all know Bottega’s leather is super, super, super, super BUTTERY soft and very light… and we all know Bottega prices in the third world are like 40000000 times higher than Bottega prices in the USA. Fuckin greedy bastards. Hahaha!
It really sucks being poor and not being able to buy things on a whim. *sigh* I begged sooo many times on this blog, hoping some politician or whatever, adopts me and make me their love child but all those mother fuckers want infants and not old jaded children like me.
Enough fantasies about bags. I think I’m gonna barf.
After shopping, I’m gonna get a haircut, a manicure, a pedicure and a full-body massage.
Last but not the least, I’m getting a facial and a microdermabrasion/powerpeeling session.
I even talked to one of my friends, Alex, one of the original "I LOVE BRYANBOY" guys, and he told me what I REALLY HATE HEARING from other people — get a boyfriend or move somewhere. Ugh! A relationship or a relocation is NOT the solution to solve one’s problems. Maybe it worked for most people but I know it will never work for me.
Bryanboy: oh i really don’t know what i want anymore in life
Bryanboy: i’m sooo exhausted. my life is soo dull
Alex: you need a boyfriend
Bryanboy: but i don’t wanna
Alex: well what’s missing?
Bryanboy: i dunno. something new!
Bryanboy: i wanna focus on myself
Alex: Maybe you should just move to NY
Alex: or London!
Bryanboy: many people told me about that
Bryanboy: either LA, NY or London
Bryanboy: just OUT of this shithole
Bryanboy: i can’t even move out of our house let alone move to another part of the world. my mom threatened suicide if i move out of the house
It’s gonna be a ME-ME-ME day tomorrow. Sometimes, the only way to rejuvenate one’s self /have a clear head/deal with things is to purge everything you’ve eaten from your plate, douche your throat with Evian and purge everything out of your system.
I know myself more than anyone else though. I have a strong feeling I’m gonna ignore the "to-do" list I just made and stay indoors the entire day.
SOMEONE HELP ME GET OUT OF THIS RUT! I’M JUST TIRED OF EVERYTHING! TIRED, TIRED, TIRED OF EVERYTHING!
PPSS. Big shout out to the following people… Thanks for loving me. I hope you know that I know that you know that I know that you know that I know that you know that I know that you know I love you too.
ZOMG! I want those shoes! Those shoes are mine, BETCH!
Ok, I know this is pushing it but whatever. Bryanboy loves Kate and Kate for Christian Dior loves Bryanboy.