Toxic Week Ahead

To cut this story short, take a peek on my PARTIAL to-do list for the week of March 27 – April 2, 2006.

My life is sooo boring and predictable it’s not even funny.

I hate having short attention span.

I think I need a breakthrough. I need to experience/do something NEW and something different.

Something EXCITING.

My Maid Went to Manhattan.

Oh. my. god.

My maid, as you all know, her name is Miss Eunice, scared the shit out of me.

She took yesterday off so she can visit some of her friends.  It’s been quite awhile since she had a "day off". She’s entitled to have sundays off but she likes to stay around the house and watch TV instead.

Anyway, we (ok, mainly I) got soo worried that she ran away cause she was supposed to be back by 10PM last night. As of now she’s still not here.

I asked my dad whether he spoke to Miss Eunice and he said yeah, she spent the night at her friend’s house and she will be back sometime today. Whew.

I don’t care what you think but she’s the best, best, best maid I ever had. In spite of accidentally washing some of my long-sleeve Lucien Pellat-Finet cashmere sweaters (into baby tee sizes with the same texture as a brilo pad) back when she was new, she knows my fashion A to Zs. She’s also the gatekeeper to my sins; she’s got my habits memorized to the back of her head and she knows what to do next even if she was blindfolded.

Ohhhhh I can’t even imagine life without Miss Eunice.

*kidding* I’m not entirely dysfunctional and incapable, you know.

I was chit chatting with one of my good friends yesterday and she told me that everytime she calls, I’m always either eating something or "drinking/making some tea".

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I’ve been sick the past few days so I’ve been indulging on chicken noodle soup and chamomile tea.

And yes, I DO FUCKIN FEND FOR MYSELF, case in point: i currently have cough and a sore throat. I have to stand up, tip toe my way to the kitchen, raid the larder etc. when I’m hungry.

I’m not one of those lazy, fat-arsed people with ding-a-ling-a-ling-ding-dong porcelain or ceramic bells. My grandma used to be one of those people. Anyway, all she had to do is ring the bell and her personal batallion of servants will get down on their knees as if she were the Sultan of Brunei. 

My grandnana is sooo stubborn and lazy. She’s got all these people living at her house to attend her every need. I don’t get it at all. She’s got one person to do the laundry, one for the food, one for miscellaneous errands, etc. And to think she only lives by herself (ok, one of my Aunts live there too). 

Enough about household help. I hope Miss Eunice comes back soon cause my room is already dirty! HAHAHAHAHA!

Bryanboy Loves… and Random Cheesemax

#1 – Bryanboy loves people from Chek Chue, Hong Kong, Paris, France, Madrid, Spain, Bath, United Kingdom, Boscoreale, Campania Italy, Toms River, NJ, Flaskebekk, Akershus Norway, Hoi Pa, Hong Kong, Skogome, Sweden, Birmingham, UK, Colfax, IN, Budapest, Hungary, Praves, Cantabria Spain, Valencia, Spain, Cockfosters, UK and of course, all the gorgeous people in Bratislava, Slovakia. I love each and every one of you. Say hi mother fuckers and don’t be shy.

# 2 – Bobby Trendy stole my halloween shoes! Put me beside him and he will make me look as if I’m a virgin nun. I have no words for this guy… no words.

I don’t understand why people associate me with him. Lower and lower middle class suburban Americans who watch cheap, white trash television, told me Bobby Trendy and I are similar.

Is it because we’re both flamboyant?

Cher1Is it because we both read Memoirs of a Gaysian?

Heck, I’m NOT even THAT outrageous. He literally makes me look as if I’m the epitome of discretion.

Think about it.

Me:   plain, white, fruit of the loom t-shirt.
Him:  Marjan Pejoski Bjork swan dress

Me:   plain, black, petit bateau t-shirt
Him:  Cher in Bob Mackie feather dress and headress on 57th Academy Awards

Bobby Trendy is pure FOB/fresh-off-the-boat Asian trash he’s not even funny at all. In fact, one of my acquaintances told me he’s half Filipino. Or something. For all we know, he could be the guy who murdered Gianni Versace, Andrew Cunanan, gayified to the extreme.

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He’s also a furniture designer. I think he had a segment at the Anna Nicole Smith show (go figure) and that’s how he became famous.

032706_annabed I have no words for his furniture style. Click here to visit his website to see for yourself. His furnishings look as if they came straight from a whore house/brothel/cheap motel. Take a look at this bed for instance. I get very disturbing mental images of wrinkly, middle-aged drag queens jumping on top this bed, playing pillow fights and all… The "Anna Bed" costs $5,000. Oi vey! Too expensivo for that little piece of shit… frankly, I’d rather buy a cheapo bed from Ikea or Crate & Barrell.

Hideous. Just hideous!

#3 – Tomorrow’s the Shu Uemura party and I still don’t have anything to wear. I have to look "bejeweled" and "dazzling". Ughhhhhhh!!!!!!!! Shu parties are the hottest tickets in town. I have to look good tomorrow. In fact, I’m gonna go shopping later this afternoon.

#4 – I LOOOVVVEEEE my new Dolce & Gabbana leather and lace bag. The leather is sooo buttery soft. The bag is HUGE though. It’s a ltitle bigger than my Fendi spy. It’s available for US$2,375 at BergdorfGoodman.com or NeimanMarcus.com. The picture doesn’t do the bag justice… it’s really really gorgeous in person.

032706_dolce

#5 – I’m on the hunt for a new men’s jacket and I like the navy pinstripe (US$1,540) one by John Galliano. I saw this while scanning the Bergdorf Goodman spring catalog. I also like the button down shirt with handpainted fishes by Etro (US$475).

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Isn’t the jacket lovely?

032706_etroshirt

I think that’s it for now. I’ll update again when I get home… it’s 2:36PM and I gotta get ready. I have some errands and shopping to do.

Email me mother fuckers. My email address is bryan@bryanboy.com. SMS +63-915-785-1492 if you have something to say.

I love you all as always.

Baboosh_3

PS. Discuss this blog post here.