Have I Changed?

A couple of people told me I got fat.

Yes I looked fat on the Dior Homme t-shirt picture – that’s a size XS, btw.

If it’s any consolation, I got so drunk on Friday night I ended up sleeping the ENTIRE day on Saturday, totally fucking up all my deadlines and appointments. How irresponsible of me. It’s like 9:32AM now and I got up like 2 hours ago.

At least I missed ALL my meals on Saturday. Not even a single meal or drink.

Ok, I had a glass or two of water but that’s about it.

Blame it on bad mood/loneliness/being pissed.

I was so pissed at myself, at my life, on Friday night.

Bah.

The only thing that pretty much made my day was my little shopping thing.

Oh fuck it.

I’ll definitely lose weight one day.

I’ll definitely become a better person.

I’m gonna do a good job at tying Hermes scarves as cummerbunds so they won’t look like an oversized piece of fabric on my cords.

Fuckinggorgeous_2 

(THAT’S A SIZE 36 LACOSTE, WOMEN’S SO GO FUCK YOURSELF IF THAT’S FAT)

*kiddin*

Set it on stone bitches, I, Bryanboy, will be skinny – NOT thin – NOT slim – one day.

I promise you I’ll contract some disease (not life-threatening though) so I’ll be majorly emaciated.

As Patsy Stone once said, my arm sinews will have enough muscles left in my arm only to lift up a credit card.

I’m going to fill my stomach with a dozen diet pills now.

No.

Erase that.

I’m going to fist fuck my throat and purge all my internal organs.

Baboosh.