Fuck the Playboy Bunny
Oh fuck it.
The Cosmo Magazine Bachelor Bash will start in less than 2 or 3 hours and my gal pal Tina is giving a massage to her beau.
Which means my Playboy bunny ears, tail and black-tie collar piece won’t be done in time.
Screw it. Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck.
I told her last weekend that I wanna come out as a playboy bunny tonight but I guess she had other priorities.
The perils of
living in the third world and not having stores that carry costume props asking favors from friends who have busy schedules.
There’s always a next time.
Fuck dressing up as a playboy bunny.
At next year’s Cosmo bash I’m flying to Thailand to get a friggin sex change, get a pair of tits that can give a pregnant bitch a run for her money and a vagina as tight as a 14 year old’s.
Then I’m going out as a fuckin dominatrix.
Bryanboy Loves… and Random Cheesemax
#1 – Bryanboy loves people from Auckland, NZ, Irvine, CA, La Fiance, France, La Habra, CA, my fans from Dallas, TX and Echterdingen, Germany. I love y’all… each and every one of you. Keep the love coming.
#2 – Oui, Ja, Yes, Si. He of the guilty-and-gay-until-proven-straight homosexual kind was there last night at Jenni Ep’s party lookin good. Gawd. I feel like a fuckin school girl every time I see him at La Embajada.
#3 – I got around 9,400 hits yesterday. I wonder where all of that came from. Keep spreading the word around bitches, a ton of them are from the Netherlands and Venezuela. I love you all.
#4 – Since everyone in the land of the brown and the natives aka Las Islas Filipinas is reading this blog, I’m gonna clean up my site, open up ad space and bombard those folks on dial up with ad torture. Email firstname.lastname@example.org or SMS me at +63-915-785-1492 if you want your ads to be posted here.
#5 – I need another holiday dammit. I wanna go to the beach. It’s been ages since I had maximum sun damage on top of a designer beach towel. I need to get brown and burned, from scalp to toes, on top of my virgin Chanel towel.
#6 – A loyal fan turned my "I wish I’m plastered on fuckin billboards at the freeway" fantasy into a virtual reality. Now if only someone can turn that virtual reality into REAL 50 Feet Tall, 150 Feet Wide billboard I’ll forever be indebted.
#7 – Send more love dammit! Be fucking creative and send your love to Bryanboy@gmail.com. PLEASE AVOID PHOTOSHOP. I only made an exception to Merrill Lynch because the damn company, I’m sure, can’t take photos of all of their employees.
I think that’s all for now. Last night’s party was one of the best parties recently and it better have a part 2.
I need to get dressed. Say hi to me later.
I’m nice and sweet.
Despite what y’all fuckfaced whoring scumbags think.
I love you all.